Fair enough, and it's nice to have a reasoned discussion for a change
I think the problem is, if you are a Leaver you are judged by the company you keep, which unfortunately is the Far Right and a bunch of proven liars and snake-oil salesmen.
I think whatever happens now there is potential for civil unrest unfortunately. If a new referendum came out on the side of remain, obviously there would be the possibility of the Far Right agitating unrest. If we leave with no deal, the consequences are so dire that civil unrest is even more likely and we'd be in serious trouble.
I agree with you here, it was a complete failure to put across the benefits of EU membership that was partly responsible, but it's also a massively difficult task to overcome decades of self-interested, right-wing media anti-EU propaganda (bent bananas anyone?).
We will not get a better deal than we have now, not with anyone, it's a simple fact. The EU will not give us a better trade deal with them outside of the club than we had inside, that much ought to be clear to anyone. Nor will we be able to negotiate better trade deals with countries that we already have a trade deal with via the EU. This is partly because they have no incentive to give a better deal to us, as a smaller player we have a far weaker negotiating hand, but also because the trade deals that are already in place have clauses specifically disallowing better deals to be negotiated with other countries (in other words, if Japan negotiated a better deal with the UK than it has with the EU, that deal would also have to be extended to the EU).
I hope this happens, but I'm genuinely interested to know which bit of the EU you'd like to change?