A magical 3 days .. and 3 nights [4-7 July 2012]

Off to the Wild West

I give two more hitchhikers a lift – they're going to Cala Conta too. They're both well into their music and we chat about Enter. The CD's putting the Terraza into perspective perfectly and we're all smiling as Jamie Funk takes over the huge bass power of the Citroen's hefty stereo system. I'm still filled with the feeling of last night – it made a powerful and lasting impression. :eek:8)

Jamie Funk – Incessant Sub
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RQ2r495nQl8

None of us have ever seen so many cars as we pull up outside Sunset Ashram :eek:. They get out and I can't find a place to park for love nor money :x. Decide to double-back and turn down the dirt road to the s'illa d'es Bosc restaurant. There's plenty of parking outside here and I pull up right by the door where there's also a rubbish bin to get rid of some of the endless cr*p I've accumulated :oops:.

There are looky looky men with eyes on stalks here but I can't be bothered to take anything more than I need so am going to have to make sure all is properly stowed in the car :rolleyes:. The key burying ritual is a real challenge to get away with unnoticed – last thing I need is to get it wet or lose it now with a flight to catch and a car full of all my valuables :spank:, which get locked between the boot and the glove compartment.

I struggle into a dry pair of boardshorts in the car and leave everything else behind bar a towel, flip flops, cigs and lighter in my Velcro pocket and my diving watch. Can't be bothered with taking the camera and the tan is much deeper now so don't even bother with a t-shirt. It's just so great to be free of “stuff” :) .. especially when you're alone and having to be responsible for everything all the blooming time. :rolleyes:

I turn right as you face the sea and walk far out along the rocks and cliffs. Eventually find a place I know I can climb down to but most people wouldn't even try. Even the flip flops and towel are an irritation and making it more difficult to move down the cliffside :x. So I throw both down to the rocks below and am free to climb barefoot now. It's so much better. Heaven knows how I'll get back up with them but worst comes to worst I'll just leave them – really wish I'd brought nothing ! :rolleyes:

As I get to the rocks below I'm grateful for my flip flops again. The rocks are very rough and hard on the feet :eek:. The tide is surging a bit today and I'm well out from the bay along the coast bordering open sea. Could easily get smashed against the rocks trying to get back out of the water here today :(, but find a place you can just about submerge yourself for a dip between the rocks :D.

It's really wild and rather envigorating. I'm out of sight of everyone bar the endless tourist boats coming and going – and the shipping lane is pretty far away from here.

So I enjoy a last blissful hour of “liberation” before deciding it's time to start climbing back. I find a much easier route up a little further along the coast and get everything back in one piece :). But I really want a last swim and join some other people down a cove closer to the restaurant with some fishing huts.

There are 3 white-looking ‘tourists', a periodically naked Spanish couple with 2 kids, and a guy who looks like something out of Spartacus with a dog - which is standing by the water's edge having a great time as his owner throws sea water over his charge :lol:. It's a strange grouping – everyone is keeping themselves to themselves and it's not nearly as relaxed here as up in the North or in Formentera.

Every stretch of the coves and rocks for a long way round from the restaurant where I parked has loads of boats and people... the boats are passing very dangerously close to swimmers at far too high a speed in my opinion :eek::eek::eek:. Even an experienced skipper could easily kill someone in the water. It's not as relaxing as I'd hoped for my last day – but I do really enjoy the last swim. 8)8)
 
One last dance ?

It's time for the final part of my trip. I threw all my prejudices to the wind and before flying out bought a ticket for Never Say Never opening party at Ushuaia through Spotlight :eek::eek:. Knew if I didn't there was no way I'd decide to go once here. Right now, I don't feel like it. Would far prefer a quiet last sunset but I'm determined to give it a try again to see whether it's changed from last year ... and with Sasha, Adam Beyer and Guy Gerber LIVE there's never going to be more of a line-up incentive for me, to be honest.

On the way, I become increasingly aware of a terrible smell :confused:. It's gagging :eek:. The windows are lowered and I try to ignore it but it's awful - and it's following me :x. Arriving in Playa d'en Bossa and parking in Space car park, my car is in a shocking state from living with me for 3 days :eek::eek::eek:


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I'm in a bit of a state myself ... and the smell is terrible :eek:. I have the car upside down looking for the source. Gone off food under the seat ? Can't find any. Smelly shorts ? Shouldn't be ... and checking, it isn't. :?:?:?:? My trainers from last night are eventually the giveaway. Absolutely gagging :evil:. Which is a shame because my other pair of shoes, being brown, don't really go with any of my shorts ! My flip flops by now are caked in dirt and mud and not fit to be seen anywhere fancy in. :confused:


Walking past Ushuaia I really need to tidy myself up a bit. No way I can go in there feeling and looking like a blooming tramp :eek: ! What to do ? My hair has gone flyaway with too much exposure to salt water (I needed a haircut !) and is uncontrollable unless hidden under a cap or just been washed. And I have no facilities now :x.

I decide drastic measures are the only way forward. Walk furtively into the hotel next door to Ushuaia, go into the gents and wash out my flip flops and feet in the sink :lol:. Never seen so much dirt come out of a pair of shoes :eek::eek::eek::eek::eek::eek:. There's still no-one around thank heavens .. and I get some soap and wash my hair quickly in the sink too, drying it under the hand dryer :lol::lol::lol:. The floor's covered in puddles of water. Can't believe I'm doing this but needs must ;) !



Squelch back to the car to 'take stock' in my Sanuk flip flops :oops:, which are absorbent with anti-bacterial treatment and reluctant to dry quickly. The car and boot are a scene of total devastation inside and out :oops::oops::oops:. I will have to pack and clean it all up before going in to Ushuaia - I'll never manage to do it in the dark if I stay in there ‘till Sasha finishes. :confused:



So I go to my usual Playa d'en Bossa “packing on the hoof place” (my PDB equivalent of the road behind the beach at Es Calo d'es Moro or in extreme circumstances the car park at the Airport !). It's the paved car park outside the Apartments between the beach and the Hotel La Noria .. which has handy recycling bins for everything laid on too. 8)



The interior car cleaning and packing experience is very stressful at the best of times ... not just because I've had less than an hour's sleep in 2 days .. but because it signals another “end” :(. Doing it outdoors though somehow makes it a bit easier to accept.. although the goldfish bowl thing of being so overlooked is pretty undignified to be honest ! I've even bought the dregs of a bottle of Febreeze in the suitcase .. amazing what a difference this makes to car hire companies' attitude when you take a car back. ;)


I manage to Febreeze my stinky shoes too enough to be wearable ... even though one of the inner soles is a gonner they're a better bet than my flip flops for Ushuaia 8). I look out a pair of decent shorts and am so hot by now just change beside the car having checked no-one was around. Half way through some German guy appears from nowhere on his way back from the beach and starts yelling “nein, nein”, shaking his head along with shouting some other comments at me ! :oops:



Either he felt my arse was not worthy of being flashed in public or he took great exception to my behaviour :lol: ! Having spent a great deal of this trip naked and seen more nudity around the coast than I can remember, I really can't take him seriously over a 10-second change of shorts in a car park – sorry :lol::lol::lol:. Just look the other way ffs – it's not such a big deal is it ? .. this is Ibiza ! ;)


So I have managed to get everything back under control ... after what seems a herculean effort ... with my bags packed in the boot and just my Ushuaia ticket, passport and car rental contract in the glove compartment it's time to have another go. Space car park ... Take 2. The neon lights are on at Ushuaia now and confirm the lineup like Theatreland billboards ...


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The party's already underway and the warm-up DJ will be on now. But I am suddenly totally deflated and can't stop thinking I really don't want to risk leaving Ibiza on a bad one if I really hate Ushuaia again. I guess I could go to Bora Bora instead if it's really too much. Time to go sort out this troublesome little head of mine ! :lol:



First stop is Tantra ... initially for a pee ! As I go in, they've really done a good job on the refurb here 8) .. and some English and Swiss people are watching the Andy Murray Wimbledon game on TV. It's actually nice here and decide to stick around. By the time I get a pint of ice cold beer and sit down, the match is finished - but Amnesia magazine keeps me amused for a bit.



DJ hits the decks. You know the one (always forget his name – hunted, distant look and spins really great tunes :lol:). Finally I'm starting to think I could get in the party mood again .. and I have another pint to make absolutely sure ;).

Feeling a bit groggy (beer isn't always the best when you're awake for really long periods of time), I decide to drop in on Geko bar for some redbull. Well, a 2 for One (large) vodka-redbull drinks deal if I'm truthful :p:twisted: ! Blimey - it's pretty much still the middle of the flipping afternoon ! :eek:



As I get towards the end of the second vodka-heavy vodka redbull, now feeling sufficiently stoked to face my demons at Ushuaia with good humour - and buzzing like bumble bee - Ibiza Rocks Diner reps are stopping groups of people walking past trying to tempt punters in to the restaurant next door. Must admit if they offered me something good I'll take it .. really need to have some food after all.



They don't say a thing to me as I walk past :(. So I decide to grab a far cheaper pizza slice from a nearby carry out frequented by reps with bar stools outside. Anxious now to get a bit of Guy Gerber action I polish off the pizza pretty rapidly as a rep gets set for another night, organizing wristbands and lists for something or other on the bar stool table next door looking shaky, hyped up and struggling to keep it all together :lol:.



I breeze up to Ushuaia, pleased with myself that I've manned up enough to get things into perspective despite my ropey condition, and looking presentable enough to fit in fine despite all the challenges ! People with wristbands just bought outside the crowd control ropes are being ushered past me at the desk and it's a bit of a squeeze.



They take their time with my Spotlight ticket despite the fact I hand over my passport with it for ID (causing some wristband-wearing guy to say “you don't have to show your f*cking passport here do you ?” as he pushes past me impatiently). I just ignore it.



My wristband duly attached I begin what was meant to be the final party of my trip :(... but is to turn into a most unlikely and surreal whorlwind journey with a very happy ending :eek:. Not in terms of the venue per se (actually, in a funny sort of way, quite the opposite) .. but as a coming together of pieces of a jigsaw which make me feel for all the world as if I'm a real life character trapped in a movie.
 
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Can't believe you've left us hanging for the finale ffs :rolleyes::lol:
Good read, as always can't wait to finish it off 8)
 
Finale is on its way soon .. moving out finally tomorrow and I am currently up to my ears in cleaning products, having totally failed to arrange for someone to come in and do it over the weekend. :rolleyes: :evil: :spank:

Looking forward to re-living a happier time through keyboard therapy as soon as this is all over :!:
 
One of the best reviews ever, I keep coming back every few hours to see if you've finished it!! such a cliff hanger haha!!
 
They don't say a thing to me as I walk past :(.


:lol::lol::lol::lol:


EDIT: cheers craig.... it's my 3rd time over there but it's the first time i've ever played a oakey-esque trance classics set... so looking forward to it!!! Plus, maybe Space 5 days later if i'm lucky and get my arse in gear and do this mix... :lol:
 
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One of the best reviews ever, I keep coming back every few hours to see if you've finished it!! such a cliff hanger haha!!

;) .. am barely conscious after completing my move today .. been a nightmare. But hopefully tmw night will be able to sit down and finish it. Not quite the same doing 3 days on 2 hours' sleep a night when you're lugging boxes down 4 flights of stairs in 29 degrees and "professsionally cleaning" your own flat at 4am because no-one would come and do it in under a week's notice :eek: :x :x :x .. typical UK :!::!::!::!::!: Still, 100% deposit return agreed today after 7 years of tenancy - I am pretty proud of that one :p !!!

... and the most important thing of all - 3 mobile broadband is working like a dream in the new place (thanks Ollienotts !) so I am alredy back online. So no more excuses for dragging it out :!: :lol: :twisted:

PS - brilliant news, Ric - congrats .. Finland won't know what's hit 'em this time !
 
100% deposit return agreed today after 7 years of tenancy - I am pretty proud of that one :p !!!

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Jesus! that is good, i think weve already f**ked our chances of 100% deposit back after 2 months :lol: that doesnt bode well lol
 
PS - brilliant news, Ric - congrats .. Finland won't know what's hit 'em this time !



:lol::lol::lol:

they certainly didn't know what hit them the first time i played when i downed a straight bottle of vodka on the dancefloor after my set then proceeded to verbally abuse half the club ( including the headline dj ) and sleaze all over nick warren's girl who thought it was hilarious apparently, before being carried out of the club, put in the back of a van and dumped back at my hotel in a heap on the floor... :lol::lol::oops:

the dinner the next night was interesting... me slouched over the table trying to get my words together to apologise to everyone the night before... :oops:
 
:lol::lol::lol:

they certainly didn't know what hit them the first time i played when i downed a straight bottle of vodka on the dancefloor after my set then proceeded to verbally abuse half the club ( including the headline dj ) and sleaze all over nick warren's girl who thought it was hilarious apparently, before being carried out of the club, put in the back of a van and dumped back at my hotel in a heap on the floor... :lol::lol::oops:

the dinner the next night was interesting... me slouched over the table trying to get my words together to apologise to everyone the night before... :oops:


I'm Ric James Bitch.
 
I'm on it .. :lol: .. cooked a big meal to properly christen new kitchen and outdoor terrace for family last night - baked scallops with lobster tail salad, rib eye steak with baby new potatoes, baked chestnut mushrooms and roasted butternut squash .. and a chocolate fondue dip with maple and pecan ice cream to finish.

Would all have been a great prelude to a writing-fest, except boshing 2 bottles of champagne and 2 bottles of red wine between 3 of us meaning by the time we'd cleared up I passed out on the couch with my laptop on my belly - and woke up like that at 7am :lol::lol::lol::oops::oops::oops:.

Will try again tonight after my exciting day of drain clearance and Roundup application :rolleyes: ;)
 
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