A magical 3 days .. and 3 nights [4-7 July 2012]

[kimajy]

A very unexpected encounter

I decide to head in the direction of Cala Nova to check out the new Atzaro Beach restaurant. Just approaching Sant Carles de Peralta when I spot another hitchhiker and do a double-take . He's straight out of the Summer of Love dressed in threadbare hippie attire, sporting Looky Looky John Lennon sunglasses, a comic original vintage hat (only missing a daisy for completeness) and a travelling bag .

He's accompanied by a dog which looks a bit like a bull mastiff puppy but probably isn't (or maybe it is ). I feel sorry for the dog (it's really hot !) and for some reason for him too – who is he going to get to stop for him looking like that ?!

Quite what went through my head to make me pull over I don't know to this day, but I felt compelled to as if some invisible force had taken me over and was using me at its will . I forced my logical mind to suspend all disbelief or caution and trusted my instincts instead, which told me that despite his extremely odd appearance he was perfectly harmless. I didn't ask him where he was going – just released my seat belt, leant across and opened the back door of the car.

The dog is waiting for a signal and I pat the seat to signal it to jump in. It's really well behaved, but panting desperately and I lower the back windows as I haven't had the aircon on. My unlikely companion sits down in the back seat but gives no clue as to his intended destination... perhaps he hasn't worked it out yet .. or maybe it isn't defined in geographic terms

I ask him in English where he is going. “Cala Vadella .. para ... Atlantis”. Hmmm ... that's a little off my intended route – and about as far from where we are as it's possible to get !!!! I've an open map on the floor under the front passenger seat and decide to pick this up and use it as a document for "contemplation and mutual reflection" .

To me, it's a 45-minute drive. I suddenly realize that to him it's a voyage of indeterminate duration which will have stops and encounters along the way. It may well take him a couple of days or more. To take him straight there would defeat an aspect of the purpose of the journey. His world is so far removed from my own present that it's hard to reconcile.. but I can empathize with it wholeheartedly.

I point at Es Canar on the map as where I'm headed, but he's reflective and silent. I immediately realize that Es Canar is probably not the best place for him to have a chance of getting another ride ! In an exchange reminiscent of the kind I've had in Africa countless times, I then suggest that I take him as far as Santa Eularia as being a good place to maybe look for his next ride. It's a detour off my route to an early dinner, but it's not a particularly big one, and I've no fixed commitments anyway. He's over the moon and smiling like a child in a sweet shop. 8).

I turn up the stereo a little and DJ W!ld's ‘Voyage' is playing. It's an uncannily fitting soundtrack to accompany our drive together, especially as the wibbling spoken vocals kick in :
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VvdIXiOl7Gw

I'm still feeling slightly bemused as to how I've ended up driving an eccentric hippie to Santa Eularia when I was off for a late lunch at a fancy Beach Club .. and as the music plays my logical mind starts jostling with my calm instincts. We're further towards Santa Eularia now but I'm not sure what's going on. ?

Rounding a bend, I spot another hitchhiker – a young guy who looks like a local Spanish resident. Decide to pull over – he's going to Santa Eularia as I expected and jumps in the back with my companion and his dog. So now I have 2 randoms and a dog in the back.. but my logical mind is quelled – for some reason it seems better this way.. and they exchange pleasantries with each other in Spanish as we drive along together. 8)

I offload my most recent traveller on the outskirts of town and it's back to one man and his dog. A kind of Spanish 'Last of the summer wine' experience . Having come all this way, I decide to look for a decent spot to set them down and work my way through town and along the foreshore before cutting up into town. When we pass by, I ask if he wants dropping at the bus stop, but he's adamant – he's hitching all the way. Eyeballing a large car park to the East of the city centre, I figure this is as good a spot as any and pull in.

He's in no hurry to get out . I ask him whether he and the dog have water. He pulls a bottle from his bag – it has about 4 inches left in it. I have two large bottles under the front passenger seat and decide to pull one out and top his water up. He seems visibly moved.

“And what about your dog ?”. He looks blank. I've nothing that resembles a dish. I gesture him to get out of the car with his dog and get out myself with the rest of the bottle of water. Signalling him to cup his hands tightly I fill them with water and the dog drinks like it's been thirsty for a week. Another two handfuls follow before the bottle is empty.

He looks me dead in the eye and simply says, this time in perfect English, “Thank you. I have been very lucky to meet you today”. I could tell he really meant it. I just smile and say “nada” before getting back in the car to drive off.. and I also really meant it.

On the scale of my own privilege to have an airconditioned car, money in my pocket, the freedom and flexibility to go where and when I please, make my own decisions and regularly have experiences many people never get to enjoy ... what I did really was ... nothing. All that might have stood in the way would be prejudice, fear, suspicion, arrogance or self-absorption. All things I've worked to root out of my life and which today seem to have melted away totally from my being 8). Something about being here seems to have that effect on me.

 

[kimajy]

Back on track ?

I'm alone again with no commitments other than those I set myself. It's very still outside now and I suddenly remember about Tres Esquinas, the friendly local bar I was going to try to find in Es Canar recommended on this Forum. 8) I decide to make that my next stop instead.

On the way, I see a sign for watersports and it dawns on me the conditions are perfect for wakeboarding. Turning down towards Cala Martina, waylaid yet again, I arrive near the bar I spent a happy hour or so a few years ago with a friend who'd just captained a motorboat charter for a group of us, near the beach side of the camping. I could never remember exactly where it was – and it brings back very happy memories finding it again. 8)8)8)

The conditions are glassy ... but there's no waterports going on here – everyone who may have been doing it is packing up and covers are going on the consoles on the boats near the bar . Decide to ask at the bar and am directed to the “next beach” where I'm told I can do wakeboarding. To get there is a long detour back onto the main road and around the southern end of Es Canar, but I spot the sign for Cesars Watersports and figure that's it ! When I finally arrive, around 6.15pm the guy on the beach is packing up the stall in front of the storage houses. He says they stop at 6pm. It's not to be ! :x

There's a pick-up truck with a number on it parked by the restaurant, though, and I call the main man from the turning circle... to make an appointment for tomorrow morning – at 10am (). I know that any later and the chop will be up too much for it to be enjoyable (for me at least). Might be a monumental mission - but it's something grounding to aim for at least .

Hitting Es Canar, it's busy and the roads are confusing to someone who's never been other than to drive through. Having forgotten to write the directions for finding Tres Esquinas down I end up driving around looking fruitlessly for something resembling my visual recall of these images ...

http://www.spotlight-forums.com/showpost.php?p=1424446&postcount=10

... which I see now are probably not visible from the road anyway ! There's no-one who looks savvy enough to ask and after a while I decide to give up and maybe try again later.

So enough getting waylaid .. I'm now really starving and Cala Nova it is. Atzaro Beach restaurant is very easy to find from the signs and there's dusty parking nearby. I take 35 Euros with me in cash and leave the credit card in case I decide to go swimming (hoping it's enough for a light meal !) and settle down at a sea-front low table.

Posted a load of photos taken that day here yesterday :
http://www.spotlight-forums.com/showpost.php?p=1429554&postcount=13

It certainly isn't cheap ! I order a caipirinha (no prices given and looking at the food prices I'm braced for up to 15Euros !). Finger-and-toe counting by this stage, I figure I'd better play it safe on the food and go for a chicken and prawn wok with noodles. Should be filling and nutritious enough. 8)

DJ's spinning great music, a little like you hear Padilla or Alfredo play – but a bit groovier . It's actually a really nice vibe and gets the toes tapping and head nodding... though the tripod bracing cemented to the potted palm trees next to where I'm sitting makes it all feel a bit like a film set ! It's quite fitting actually – as the whole day is starting to feel like something off a movie. And little did I know this was all just the trailer !

Complimentary bread and alioli arrives (though I'm now braced for a couvert as I don't find out till the bill arrives that it's free).. and it helps stop the Caipirinha going to my head too fast on an empty stomach. The stir fry is fine – nice big juicy prawns and tender chicken served in a fancy large bowl which slanted towards you on an angle. But it's far too oily for my taste. Overall, it's what I was expecting – good enough but not world-beating.

A lively conversation about pricing (seemingly at some restaurant venture) is underway at the table next door and my attempts to quietly digest my late lunch are challenged by every sentence ending with my real first name (wholly unrelated) ! In my state of rather heightened awareness brought about by a day of sensory stimulation it gets totally disturbing after a while :x – in fact it's starting to freak me out - and I settle up to go. Looking at the beach, it's never been my favourite and I decide to skip the swim.

The Caipirinha was far less than I'd budgeted and I could have afforded a steak for the money I had. Ah well – guess I should have just asked.

I try and fail again to find Tres Esquinas on my way back through Es Canar and am a little hot and bothered to get out or pull over and ask anyone. So carry on instead to Playa Niu Blau for a levelling swim off the rocks (8)) in front of the main restaurant just out of the shadow of the shade which covers much of this beach in the early evening. Pura Vida has no beats today and it's quiet here. 8)8). Much restored, I've 45 minutes left until Sunset ... so it's finally time to head home to San Antoni to see in the night ahead. Despite not having left the hotel until 2pm, It really feels like it's been a marathon day.

 

[Johnny Vodka]

Good stuff. Cute little story about the hippy and his dog.

 

[diver]

Soooo much better than my last trip.
Brilliant.
What is it with that thing where starters are more expensive than mains?

 

[kimajy]

we where trollied down the blue bar watching the alien landing and nearly missed it..

... I tried to get a room on Wednesday night in Formentera actually - had exactly the same thoughts ... but the cheapest I could find was 150Euros a night single in a very average gaff which didn't even have wifi. Way too much - I'm not surprised their occupancy is down if they're banking on Italians to pay that sort of money this year .. I certainly won't

love the ritual... i know that feeling walking in around 8 or 9am... shameful! LOL

devious decoy tactics deployed to avoid getting 'labelled' at Reception

What is it with that thing where starters are more expensive than mains?

I reckon it's because most "pretty women" on a permanent diet can't eat and peck on a starter .. their men will never complain about paying more for La Femme

 

[kimajy]

San Antoni calls ...

On the trip back, I'm absolutely rocking out to Remo's mix. It's been round & round and is really starting to grow on me 8)8). The approach road from the Ronda towards The Egg is at a standstill – it's so busy in San Antoni for early July – never seen it like this so early in the Season. Maybe it's something to do with people still around from the 123 Festival. Crawling towards The Egg roundabout in San Antoni, my eardrums are inured to the volume from driving on fast roads with the windows down and I'm oblivious to how loud the stereo really is. Doomwork is pounding out of the car and as I look out, the whole pavement's hooked and grooving

Doomwork - Natural Beat
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wYh2xz68zjI

By the time I reach the Egg roundabout, Guy Gerber is holding centre stage and has the surrounding airwaves completely by the balls :

Guy Gerber - One Day in May

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ejzIzfG5UYU

If this is the promo for tonight's party on the Terrace at Space, it should be one h*ll of a night !

The traffic has really set me back and there's no time to mess about experimenting tonight if I'm to have any quality time before the sun goes down. . I park up behind the beach at Es Calo d'es Moro and take stock. Almost go into Golden Buddha but Fatboy Slim is meant to be playing Mambo tonight (along with Laidback Luke who I pray isn't playing when I get there) and decide to go see for myself how things are round the corner and along the promenade. What a shocker – it's like mid-August !!!

Being back late (as usual ), I've failed to get any booze from the supermarket as I'd never planned to come near here. There are so many pumped up security guards in front of the bar the atmosphere is terrible – like walking through a riot control line just getting in :x. Decide to throw caution to the wind and have a 14Euro Mojito Royale from the bar round the side of Mambo to "get through the Sunset", which is imminent. I must honestly admit the Mojito Royale isn't great !!! However, the chunky glass is lovely !

Stir it up and use the straws for a couple of long sips to get the sugar hit and then ditch them. No way I'm braving those rocks with poncy straws in my glass! .. I can't stand the atmosphere and go right down to the water's edge to tough it out with my feet dipped in the water and my glass being lapped by the waves to try to make the best I possibly can of it all. Daren't even think of how it used to be – will just get really upset.

The sunset is thankfully prompt in its arrival and I breathe a sigh of relief when it's over.

Really mustn't let curiosity get the better of me sometimes ! What little remains of my calm demeanour is totally annihilated as Laidback Luke starts banging out naff West End bar music fodder which defaces the colourful sky . In about 20 minutes, commercial Ibiza has destroyed my happy, carefree state of mind and any sense of inner peace I've been relishing all day. It's astonishing.

I hot-foot it back to Es Calo d'es Moro and get straight in the car. Somehow without clocking it I've still got the glass in my hand from Mambo.. decide to put it in the side-pocket of the door – maybe if I get the time I can return it to them tomorrow.. I can't face running that gamut again tonight Decide not to go straight home and head over to Itaca in an attempt to restore my sense of balance and appetite for a party. There's easy parking opposite too .. which really helps. 8)

Russ Yallop is spinning on the rooftop as a warm-up party for the Paradise Hot Creations night at DC-10 hosted by Departure which I picked up on from a FB invite. Certainly not going to the main event with Richie Hawtin's new Enter opening party going down at Space .. but I rate the Departure crew and pre-parties are a nice way of enjoying some of the DJs without doing the main party.

It's really really quiet when I get up there.. the music's good with great moments but either a load of people have already skidaddled to DC-10 or the word clearly hasn't got around. I stick around for a couple of mango daiquiris – at 5Euros they're incredibly good value here . There are a handful of single people finishing their dinners, Russ's group (with some Departure people) on the sofas near the decks and a random or two near the bar. Andy Young is fleeing around in and out of the back of the bar looking very unsettled. His own parties are really popular and very good – this must be a bit of a challenge !

I'm feeling totally drained from my earlier experience at Mambo and take a table to enjoy my drinks and get into the music. Can't be moved to get up and dance even when Russ Yallop's crowd get up for a little boogie.

Some people start drifting in – two young Essex lads - one with a back-to-front cap and the other with a ruler-straight parting in his brylcreamed hair, and obviously moisturised skin, both with legs popping out of shiny 3-inch polyester hard-shell shorts with “go faster” stripes up the sides and tight-fitting oddly cut vests struggling to contain their nipples . They heckle “come on Russ” from their bar stools if he drifts into introverted Visionquest back catalogue territory.

The lads are followed around 15 minutes later by a group of six girls wearing hotpants half way up their buttocks lol:) ..each in a different bright colour which clashes with their St Tropez spray-tans, bikini tops and gleaming white pumps. Hmmm.

It takes the young lads about a minute to decide to go straight over to the girls in hotpants and try out their chat-up lines. It's like the air is filled with raw ‘teenage sex' – except I'm sure they're all in their early 20s. By now I'm no longer transfixed by the cameo I'm really amused by it. In fairness, meat market extravaganza aside, they're all bursting with Ibiza excitement, seem to know all the tracks being played and are determined to have a real banging party at DC-10 ("oioioi" ).

They're certainly acting differently to the way I often witness in London – in many ways for the better as there's no strutting cock-jostling or coke-aggro, just people clearly up for fun in their own way ... maybe it's the sunshine. Still, I'm very glad I'm going to Space tonight .. a club full of these guys all night might be just a tad too much !

Finally feeling energized enough to get up. I've been hiding under a cap all evening and go over to have a quick chat with Andy Young – he seems mortified I'm there for some reason .. clearly not seeing the positive side of anything and is obviously very reluctant to do the warm-up party thing again . I don't stick around and head back to the Hotel Abrat to get myself ready for Space 8).

Shower, change of shorts and top, DND sign on the door and I'm away out pretty early by my standards. I've a guest list for Space, a welcome and much appreciated gesture – very many thanks for this (you know who you are !) 8)8)8)8)8).

Can't be bothered to waste time finding a bar in Playa d'en Bossa and decide to tank up on home-strength vodka redbulls a bit in the car when I arrive – I'm going to be spending a small fortune on drinks in there tonight for sure, so may as well give myself a little break ! The queue's only about 10 minutes long. Only downside of ‘Spanish-style' pre-drinking is the unimaginable need for a pee which inevitably sets in before you get into the club !

Space people are nice as ever on the door and I'm finally in... so looking forward to checking out this night.

 

[freakstar]

It's really really quiet when I get up there.. the music's good with great moments but either a load of people have already skidaddled to DC-10 or the word clearly hasn't got around.

It seems to be like that every time I venture there (although several years ago I was there one morning and it was well kicking off). It such a great place to chill and i have met several new great friends there but somehow it doesn't seem to attract the pre-party crowd as much as other places do.

 

[Barnett08]

Such a great review, am enjoying the read!!! Always wondered why Itaca seemed quiet, cheap drinks, good location (seafront) and top tunes spinning....

 

[kimajy]

^^ It's usually busy at the Departure parties

http://www.ibiza-spotlight.com/night/reviews/2012/review_departure_ibiza_opening_party_2012_i.htm

Event details are always put up here : https://www.facebook.com/#!/DepartureEvents

Barnett08 - sorry .. just read you were at Itaca on Sunday so you'd probably have been there during one of these. Were you on the rooftop or in the main bit downstairs ?

 

[Barnett08]

I was there Sunday just gone till about 1am - we were sat out the front, i didnt notice anything really going off upstairs or inside..?? maybe i was in my own world!...thinking about it ...they did have some dancers, in leopard morph suits, on the wall and some muscle dudes strutting around inside - HA its mad how after being there for a few days everthying becomes the norm

 

[kimajy]

I was there Sunday just gone till about 1am - we were sat out the front, i didnt notice anything really going off upstairs or inside..?? maybe i was in my own world!...thinking about it ...they did have some dancers, in leopard morph suits, on the wall and some muscle dudes strutting around inside - HA its mad how after being there for a few days everthying becomes the norm

The Departure parties are on the roof - you go up the stairs on your left as you face Itaca from the sea. You often can't really tell what's going on up there from below .. until you go up

 

[ric]

this, without a doubt, has to be the best review i've read on here!!!!! it's got everything!!! i'm laughing my head off at some of the stuff!! i can just picture the "one man and his dog" scenario in my head...

looking forward to the Ushuaia section....

 

[kimajy]

looking forward to the Ushuaia section....

Shhh ... nothing on this Earth could have prepared me for any of that Sorry to drag it out ... I'm procrastinating over my house move like a helpless chicken but really have to sort it now

 

[ric]

Shhh ... nothing on this Earth could have prepared me for any of that Sorry to drag it out ... I'm procrastinating over my house move like a helpless chicken but really have to sort it now

call in the A-team.... or better still, call in a few milkmaids...

 

[kimajy]

call in the A-team.... or better still, call in a few milkmaids...

... nope - just

 

[kimajy]

A night at Space

The last time I was in Space on a Thursday night, it was only really the Terraza that was rocking to the sounds of Kehakuma. I've been hit and miss with Richie Hawtin over the last few years and far from being pre-disposed to rate his night I was prepared for a disappointment.


Nothing could have been further from what I actually walked into. The place was absolutely going off. Although I've already missed the concept 'big DJ in small space' at Enter.Sake (El Salon) from 10pm-midnight, Dubfire doesn't really do it for me at the best of times.. but I'd love to see another DJ do this in there another time.


Kick off by tracking down a set timetable – all the rooms have been renamed and I have to ask someone to translate ! The brain's a bit fuddled already and I can't retain the set times so just go for a wander. The Terraza is fantastic. The lighting has been changed and there's an almost moonlit blue glow.. Kehakuma's sound is top notch tonight and when this track drops after I've been hearing it all day on the mix CD in the car I'm getting excited and really loving it !

&ME - Ashes
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZCUJO6hN7G4

The Discoteca is great too – but decide to pop into El Salon for a fag. Walking in it's been transformed. The mood is completely different and Hito is playing ambient chill-out music. It's only a week or so before I was moaning on at length about the fact that you never get ambient chill-out zones at mental parties any more. What a treat. 8)8)8)

Actually have to sit down to take it all in. Richie Hawtin is over at the bar chatting to people like a perfect host and there's a really relaxed and friendly atmosphere – like a private party 8). Over at the bar, two gorgeous looking women are mulling over the premium sake list and declining offers of service to give them some more time to think over what they fancy.

Decide to check it out myself and open a conversation. They're cautious but interactive and turn out to be Australian . We have a chat about things ‘Southern hemisphere' and a lot about Atlantis and some hidden places on the island. I tell them about the kayaking trip I did and one of the girls is really keen to do it maybe next day. Could be fun .


We swap numbers and agree I'll get in touch with them again in tomorrow. I pop over to the other side of the bar to buy a 35Euro glass of premium sake to try . It's really smooth and beautifully aged. I'd hope so for that price ! Returning to where the girls are still sat, they don't want to try it and suggest I join them and the rest of their party in the Discoteca.

The girl who is very friendly apparently has a boyfriend (a 6ft 4 Aussie hunk who's actually really friendly and wearing big shades) ... but still . They're also there with a very normal looking guy, short – mid-30s who is boshing drinks and looking a little bit drink-frazzled and self-conscious . A little (rather twatted) exchange with one of the girls reveals it's him they're all accompanying – and apparently he's a millionaire who made his money in the prawn business. Okayyyyy !!


We all have a boogie together until I have to go to the loo ... and when I return about 15 minutes later after a detour for another fag they've moved somewhere else (or I forgot where I left them .. one of the two !).

I've sunk a few vodka redbulls and am wired for Techno . The music just gets better and better and by the end of the night I've been techno stomping like a fiend for 2 hours straight, even through painful bouts of the ‘stitch', without stopping to catch breath at the back of the Discoteca with Hawtin & friends at the helm.

Everyone was really going for it (was a proper Techno night), including a blonde-haired 40-something, seemingly on her own or having lost her friends in a coral dress with sandals.


She's smiling like she's never had such a good time, dancing with loads of people and firing them up on the dancefloor, and there's just such a fun atmosphere here tonight 8)8). I'm actually really drawn to the woman in the coral dress ! Banging beats start getting dropped down for a minute or so almost like a loop .. and eventually she's had enough and leaves. I want more – I'm not done yet !!!


Ibiza Spotlight again did a good review of this night here
http://www.ibiza-spotlight.com/night/reviews/2012/review_enteropening_050712_i.htm


Crawling out of Space on all fours at well gone 7am into the brilliant sunshine with your ears ringing is always cause to pause for a moment of reflection . The initial feeling of shock at what's just hit me and what I've been “up to” all night always turns to a little laugh to myself to get by.. am I ever going to get too old for all this ?

 

[kimajy]

Handling the aftermath .. and a new low !

I can't make it back to San Antoni. No way I'm completely exhausted and in no fit state at all. Just make it as far as the pay car park at Salinas instead (the barrier is up and there's no-one there), park up in the shade of a covered bay, roll the seat back a tad and collapse asleep instantly.


When I come round less than an hour later I'm literally drenched in sweat from head to toe and feeling clinically dehydrated :x. Almost can't move . I'd left the windows shut and it must be close to 40 degrees in the car . This is seriously not good . The barrier guys have arrived – hope I'm not challenged over tickets in this state.

Tear off my t-shirt, throw open the door and pull myself out of the car and round to the boot. I've Dioralyte, Zantac and a mini-medical kit in there along with masses of water thank heavens. Finding the glass from Mambo last night still in the door of the car I'm able to mix up 2 rounds of Dioralyte, stirred up with pen, and feel at least a glimmer of civilization about the whole messy affair.


Another litre of water and a cigarette, and I'm almost feeling like I'm not about to die. It's nearly 8.30am. I apologize in advance for the next bit but have decided to include it to illustrate the sheer degradation of the consequences of my self-inflicted over-indulgence . Up there with the “all-time lows”


Car pulls up alongside and a couple begin the tortuous ritual of “getting themselves from car park to beach with all their stuff” . At the same time I am seized with the need to take a dump, the urgency of which is building by the minute. I'm almost panicking – I can't even face getting out of the car such is the fragility of my frame of mind . The couple fart and faff around like I've never seen :x and eventually amble off with more paraphernalia than you'd see at a night at Elrow. FFS !


Keeping my head below the top of the car door and now feeling very furtive indeed , I sneak out once they are out of sight and hot-foot it into the scrub. I reckon I have about 30 seconds tops to go before there is a nasty accident. Just then a wildlife area truck appears and I'm clenching with everything I have to get through the next 10 seconds as it drives past :x:x:x:x.


Darting into the thick of the bushes I'm reduced to my most basic of acts in the open air – squatting behind a Rosemary bush . I suddenly get a flash of dogs kicking up the ground after they have taken a dump.... and decide to bury what I've just deposited with dust. Sweet Jesus, what am I doing ... and how did I let it ever come to this ?


I manage somehow to find some broad-leaved plant material nearby and back at the car my small bottle of handwash and bottle of water restore some semblance of decorum.

 

[kimajy]

Well I guess a new day has sort of dawned !

Clinging on to my self-respect by a thread, I think about going for a swim at Salinas, knowing it will level me perfectly – but it's 8.45am now and I suddenly remember about my appointment to go wakeboarding in Es Canar at 10am .

In my condition it'll take me a loooooong while to get ready so I'd better head off now if I'm going to make it. It'll be very hard work in this condition but may just set me up for the day . I decide to text the people I met last night to ask them to get in touch by 2pm if they want to go ahead with the Atlantis trip today. Will probably forget otherwise the state I'm in !

The CD in the stereo is swapped for Northern Exposure 0 degrees North. It always cheers me up and soothes me when I'm feeling very fragile. On the outskirts of Ibiza Town on the road up to Santa Eularia I spot a young girl thumbing a lift. Pick her up – she's going to the camping at Cala Martina where I was yesterday, not far at all from the watersports centre. 8)

She can't be more than about 19 and is French, speaking only a very little bit of English. Decide to practice my French a bit – but the vocabulary recall is less than impressive – brain ... just ... not ... working ! I confess to her about spending the night at Space and turns out she's looking for work face-and-body painting. Asks me if Space would be a good place to look ? No ! Zoo Project and the like are a far better bet.

I find out about all sorts of things going on up North I didn't know about that the ‘beatnick' French community get up to, party-wise . One of these trips I'll go spend some days up there without being ‘on the clock' so much or being enslaved to a wifi source ... sounded just like the old days and a whole other dimension in these days of the 'modern' Ibiza. 8)8)8)

I drop her off door-to-door to her old digs in Es Canar - she can't believe she's got back so early and now has a whole morning to herself before check-in to the Cala Martina camping. She doesn't fancy coming out in the boat though – wants to have a sunbathe in the garden where she's staying. ? Nah - fair enough I guess !

So onwards to Cesar's Watersports. They all seem genuinely staggered that I've turned up before 10.00am. I confess to my antics the night before in advance .. just to make sure they go easy on me .. and sing the praises of the Enter night. Even if there's a decent wake, I'm not going to do anything adventurous in my condition ... muscles are over-relaxed / tired and it's easy to injure yourself if you mess up tricks in that physical state. Force down a banana with an Espresso from the bar to keep me going. 8)

The main man is actually really impressed I'm prepared to ride at all – he says not many people would even think about trying. To be honest I didn't think it was that much of a 'hardcore' thing to do .. my self-respect is starting to come back ! I have to use his board with oversized bindings (always hopeless for me as I have very narrow feet) as I've not brought mine.. and pre-tighten them as much as I possibly can on the beach before putting the board on again in the water. Here goes ...

Before we set off, I'm asked if I mind photos being taken of me wakeboarding to use with their publicity. Seems they hardly ever get punters who can ride already turning up (I know why – but I'm happy to do it in Ibiza on the sea for the exercise and stimulation rather than the boat and conditions). I explain why I do mind and thankfully they're not too ‘put out' I won't go along with it ! 8)

I'm tangibly gutted when rather than firing up the nice big boat with inboard motor that's moored nearby I'm chucked a handle tied to a Rib inflatable with a rope rather than a proper Spectra line :x. This really is going to be just messing about – you can't jump wakes without a wake to jump and a rope won't hold tension in the chop at all ! Never mind - probably just as well or I might take silly risks !

It's really hard work, especially in those oversized bindings. May as well be wakesurfing ! Muscles are barely functional by now . I don't get arm ache any more but the legs and ankles are taking a real hammering turning the board over the chop which is tangible even at this time of day . Probably manage about 10 minutes of the 15 minute set, get round a couple of bays and signal to go back in. It's really all I can handle today ... but I feel a million times better for it afterwards. 8)8)8)

It still takes me nearly an hour to recover and get myself ready to leave after we return to the beach roll:. It's now gone 11.15am when I finally head out. So where to today then ? My flight's at 1.30am tomorrow morning so be good to make the best of the time I have left. 8)

 

[kimajy]

So where to ... and a minor derailment !

After humming and hawing I decide to go to Sant Joan de Labritja and Portinatx. 8)8).. and head out through Santa Eularia on the better roads.


I must be 3kms or so up the road to Sant Joan when it suddenly occurs to me ... checkout deadline at the Hotel Abrat in San Antoni is in 15 minutes' time at noon . I'd completely forgotten all about the hotel ... and my laptop and valuables are all in the room with a Do Not Disturb sign on the door.

SH!T – I will have to go there immediately. Takes me a while to find somewhere safe to pull off for a 3-point turn and when I do, I phone the hotel and tell them a bit of a story that I've had a meeting over-run in Santa Eularia and am on my way straight there to check out so not to worry !


Why on earth I feel the need to keep up a pretence of respectability via an elaborate story is ... well .... perfectly understandable when I come to think about it ! I'm a regular there after all and there's every point giving them a reasonable face-saver . They've been really good to me after all – a bit like a family – and you don't give your family unnecessary reasons to feel .. well .. marginalized or unimportant when they are important.


But truth is you're in the middle of a right old bender they're better off not knowing about it ! Whether they believed a word I said is quite another story


I promise to be back as soon as I possibly can (I'm told they're full and really need the room ASAP), screech up in front of the hotel around 12.15pm, let reception know I'm on the case and run upstairs to grab my stuff . Fortunately, my suitcase is in the car already and I only left a rucksack's worth of valuables in the room to have to "handle".


The bed looks really comfortable and inviting ... but I've missed that boat ! Decide to plug in my phone for a last boost whilst taking a much-needed hasty shower and having a shave/brush of my furry teeth ! It's all one heck of an effort ! I paid on arrival, so dodge waiting for the stag do checking in to finish messing around with who is going into what room, filling out endless forms and finding their many passports

Bid my farewells and breathe a huge sigh of relief to get back in the car. Stereo goes on and I just sit there, a little in shock, deciding what I can handle doing after all this . Then it occurs to me – the hotel thing can all be a bit of a pain in the neck on a short trip to be honest. How many times do I never see my room ? It's just such a hard thing to do to risk not having a bed for the night when you're back home planning your trip ... and seems such a beatnick thing to do to just not bother in the cold light of a British day !

 

[kimajy]

Trying to get life back on some kind of track ..

Feeling shaky and underfed, I need food badly . Then I remember – there's my emergency roll from Subway last night in a carrier bag on the front passenger seat. Decide to get out of San Antoni – I never intended to be here today and am grappling with the fact I am not in the North as I'd got my head around being there today earlier. Decide to head out to the Bay to find a spot to eat my filled roll and have a swim.


Remo CD goes back in the slot and I crank up the sound to bring back some of the feeling from last night. It works – and I'm rocking out in no time . It's not a deserted beach in Formentera - but it'll do for now 8).


I eventually wind up at a cul-de-sac round the corner from Playa Pinet, where you can park up easily and swim off the rocks. Swim first .. sandwich after. Have a very narrow escape from stepping on a black urchin trying to get in the water without using the little ladder nearby . But it's a nice swim here once you're in 8). Eat my roll and decide to move on, restored again. After the places I've been this trip it's really not a beautiful environment here at all.


Decide to check out Ocean Beach Club and see what all the fuss is about. I pull into the car park and get out – there's no music and it seems just about deserted from the outside . Very sleepy indeed... and I've no desire to spend any more time in this area. It's obviously way too early and I don't want to end up being asked to pay entry tickets just for a quick look around. So still feeling exceptionally incapable of dealing with the remotest negativity, move on again ... back again the way I've just come !


Time is flying by – it's gone 3pm already. I'm looking at a map but nothing computes. Am really struggling to make any decisions at all now .


In the end, there seems only one sensible thing to do – go to either Cala Conta or Cala Carbo. I'm nearby and you can do a lot worse. Can;t face going all the way back to Sant Joan de Labritja now. I've still not heard from the people I met at Space so pretty much give up on the idea of an Atlantis trip with company today . I'm certainly not chasing people I've just met to organize things for them !


So Cala Conta it is then 8).