Mental Health- It’s a bit of a bugger

Padster

Active Member
Thanks for sharing your story.... :) its amazing that you are at a place where you can live a relatively normal life...

I am always interested in people that have to live with bipolar or schizophrenia etc

Great advice for people suffering
No worries. I've lost two good, close friends to suicide through mental illness and even more to the wilderness that their lives became to not want to share my experiences and help wherever I can.
 

mashednlovingit

Well-Known Member
@Bahamas those are excellent quotes, especially from Marcus Aurelius. Where can I get paper copies of his writings?

The reason I ask is that there are some bad reviews regarding translations of his book 'Meditations' on Amazon.
 

Bahamas

Active Member
@Bahamas those are excellent quotes, especially from Marcus Aurelius. Where can I get paper copies of his writings?

The reason I ask is that there are some bad reviews regarding translations of his book 'Meditations' on Amazon.

There is indeed quite a variety to be found among the translations.

Quotes were taken from Sir George William Chrystal's version, originally published in 1902 and reissued by Clydesdale Classics in 2018: https://www.amazon.nl/MEDITATIONS-Complete-Unabridged-Marcus-Aurelius/dp/1945186240

I also own copies of Martin Hammond's translation (hardback published by Penguin Classics) and George Long's version (paperback published by Dover Thrift).

English is not my native language but I find myself mostly related to Crystal's interpretation.

For example Book IV §51 :
Run ever the short way. The short way is the way according to Nature. Therefore speak and act according to the soundest rule; for this resolution will free you from much toil and warring, and from all artful management and ostentation. (G.W. Chrystal)

Always run on the short road: and nature's road is short. Go then for the healthiest in all you say and do. Such a purpose releases a man from the labours of service, from all need to manage or impress. (Martin Hammond)

Always run to the short way; and the short way is natural: accordingly say and do everything in conformity with the soundest reason. For such a purpose frees a man from trouble, and warfare, and all artifice and ostentatious display. (George Long)


The form factor is also something to keep in mind. This is a manuscript which entices page turning and rereading. I find myself consulting random passages briefly on various occasions. On some parts you may want to have some background information (although most of the writings speak for themselves).

Chrystal's version is an easy to handle paperback with a decent layout (clear font and spacing) that cuts to the chase. It's provided with a short foreword and contains no additional notes.

The hardback by Penguin Classics requires more reading willingness, it's quite sturdy for browsing. On the other hand overall production quality and layout are stunning. Very durable, detailed numbering, an excellent introduction including chronology and further reading tips, extensive additional notes, and it comes with a handy bookmark.

Dover Thrift's version of George Long's translation is a very basic paperback; paper quality and cover feel cheap, short introduction, no notes, not much attention was paid to layout. Ok for travelling but wouldn't recommend it. Paperback of Chrystal's version is the better option if you're looking for a paperback to carry along.

Personally I consult Chrystal's version most of the time for original writings, and look into secondary literature to gather additional insight.

There's also a nice blog post of centireader Ryan Holiday on his personal experience with Aurelius' writings. https://ryanholiday.net/100-things-learned-10-years-100-reads-marcus-aureliuss-meditations

Enjoy your trip.
 
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AndrewStennisrGUY

New Member
Oh… These Covid times have changed us a lot. Before it, I used to be very social, had a lot of friends and every weekend, we went to a club or a pub or arranged a party. Also, I have a good job and was promoted at work, thinking about plans for the future and stable life. But 2020 changed everything. I lost my job, became quite reserved, and lost both mental and financial stability. So, I was starting to realize that if it went on further, it would turn into depression. I was looking through different forums and found a good clinic where I eventually received professional help. If you are interested, I'll leave the link here (https://fherehab.com/depression/treatment). Since I started my therapy, many aspects of my life have changed – I've found a new good job, my friends understood me, and we hung out again. If you need help, I can provide you with more information. Also, I'm ready for chatting and support at any time.
 
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Tourist

Active Member
I know a few people really badly affected by the last 3 years - brexit was already a stress, then the pandemic and now the fear of a world war. The temptation is to just anaesthetise your senses with drink and drugs but you can only realistically do that for so long. My gf has had really bad depression to the point of not leaving the flat for days on end and obv it's a massive stress on everything. I've probably changed a fair bit too without realising. Some friends have just disappeared completely and I don't want to harangue people who maybe just need space. I do get irritated by employers who work you to the bone, offer no extra pay and then insult your intelligence with counselling tips. All of it is just ugh.
 

CraigyB

Active Member
So, this is my 1000th post and I suppose a fairly important one. I’ve been drafting it for a few weeks, and it will be long and rambling, but here goes...

A few weeks back, I posted that I was thinking about writing about my mental health, but was uncertain as it might come across as a bit self indulgent and inward looking, but a few of you said you were cool with it, so thought I would give it a crack. This isn't a deep dive into all aspects of mental health over all people and all time, but more a view on how I have experienced it, and how my experiences and approach have changed over time, particularly over the last year or so during C*vid times.

So, up to maybe two years ago, I considered myself to be in pretty good shape, mental health wise. Good home life, decent job, a few select friends and enough cash to be able to do nice things. The strange thing is that I can’t pick an event or an instance that caused things to change a bit.

I started to experience some pretty anxious feelings that rational me would know are ridiculous, but the anxious me seemed to suppress that rationalisation somehow. This led to sleepless nights, struggle for focus, worry about so many little things all across normal life that previously wouldn’t have been of any concern to me at all. I wish I could say that I had some magic solution that caused me to crack it, but the reality is that I haven’t found it (yet) and the anxiety has become almost an accepted part of my life.

At no point would I have considered myself to be at the extreme end of things, no drastic considerations about not carrying on or anything like that, but it has just become a sort of constant hum in the background of day to day living.

The last year or so has been both good and bad for me in relation to this- good in that it has made me not be subject to those stressful social scenarios that caused me so much strain, but bad in that of those situations aren’t there, it’s almost impossible to combat the feelings around them- fire or fury!

If you met me for the first time, you would probably walk away thinking I was relatively confident, fairly talkative, but maybe a little quiet on occasion. Generally, you'd be right, but what you can't see is the constant inner dialogue that's going on, the stress about saying the right thing, saying anything at all, or saying nothing. The lack of seeing people too much recently has removed this from my worry list.

However, I desperately want to be able to be that social person, to chat to anyone when out and about, to be able to present to work colleagues with confidence and doubt- I’ve got a fair old way to go to get back to there again.

I don’t consider myself to be “ill”, more that there’s just this unwanted aspect to my way of thinking that I’d like to sod off and set me free again before it’s too late and the opportunities dry up. There are many many people out there who have it much much worse than I do.

Now, all of this might be a load of self indulgent bollocks, or it might resonate with you a little, a lot, or not at all. You might think I'm strange, or perfectly normal. However, this is how I am, and how I suspect a lot of people are as well.

This post has not been designed for attention, or sympathy, or to kick off any deep conversation, but more to set out my experiences in writing, and it might light a bulb with one or two of you. Maybe this is my own therapy, and you folks have just been subjected to it in a forum which has little to do with it- if so, I apologise.

I suppose my overall message is that I am a bit weird, and you probably are a bit too. Talk if you're comfortable, but don't feel under any pressure to if it's not your thing. You know you, and those that are close to you care if they are genuinely good people.

Look after yourselves and each other, we're all on this mad ride together, and I really really hope to meet some of you very soon for a welcome Fanta Limon and a filthy rave up- this group of people have been super valuable to me- I don’t know any of you, but I feel like I know you all a little bit.

Always happy to chat with anyone about anything, either in here, or via DM, on the phone or in real life. Don’t forget the great motto of life- Don’t be a dick.

xx

PS- hope you’re all being nice to each other in the C*vid thread!
Great post.

I have someone close in my family that experiences very similar. Has concluded through some therapy along with his anxiety that he has OCD and doesn't have that trigger that enables us to switch off thought processes and can impact social interactions like you described.

Good luck.
 

Life of Rye

Well-Known Member
Totally resonate with you @eclipse15 and thank you for sharing. I myself was in a real shocker of a hole not very long ago and I didn't even have any reason to be I just had this cloud or fog that would not leave.

Anxiety can be a real bitch and an emotion that at times can be totally crippling. Resulting in you behaving like someone or something you are not. Which then leads you to overthinking, worrying and believing you are somewhat hopeless though you know deep down you are worth more.
Of course these feelings then repeat into anxiety. Its a vicious circle

This is going to sound completely voodoo but hear me out honestly. There was a big discovery I made in that I was extremely low in vitamin D levels. There were a number of symptoms backing this up too but importantly research shows that low vitamin d leads to low moods. In fact vitamin D activates serotonin synthesis. I also learnt that vitamin D is the most important vitamin as well as it actually is more a hormone than a vitamin.

So I started to supplement vitamin D taking in 7500iu's (3x small tablets) a day and within a few days I felt so much better. I have been continuously doing this for 6 weeks and genuinely I feel like a different person to date. I feel so chilled, happy and aware of life's beauty. I now recommend taking Vitamin D to everyone and I will never ever stop consuming it.

Please try it out for yourself I am certain you will feel huge improvements and when you do I would love to hear you post back in time on your results.
 

cunninghamali

Well-Known Member
Totally resonate with you @eclipse15 and thank you for sharing. I myself was in a real shocker of a hole not very long ago and I didn't even have any reason to be I just had this cloud or fog that would not leave.

Anxiety can be a real bitch and an emotion that at times can be totally crippling. Resulting in you behaving like someone or something you are not. Which then leads you to overthinking, worrying and believing you are somewhat hopeless though you know deep down you are worth more.
Of course these feelings then repeat into anxiety. Its a vicious circle

This is going to sound completely voodoo but hear me out honestly. There was a big discovery I made in that I was extremely low in vitamin D levels. There were a number of symptoms backing this up too but importantly research shows that low vitamin d leads to low moods. In fact vitamin D activates serotonin synthesis. I also learnt that vitamin D is the most important vitamin as well as it actually is more a hormone than a vitamin.

So I started to supplement vitamin D taking in 7500iu's (3x small tablets) a day and within a few days I felt so much better. I have been continuously doing this for 6 weeks and genuinely I feel like a different person to date. I feel so chilled, happy and aware of life's beauty. I now recommend taking Vitamin D to everyone and I will never ever stop consuming it.

Please try it out for yourself I am certain you will feel huge improvements and when you do I would love to hear you post back in time on your results.
Glad you feeling better! Anxiety is a bitch indeed!

Please can you let me know what vit D tablets you are taking? I have tried to look online for some but not sure which are the best ones
 

eclipse15

Active Member
Totally resonate with you @eclipse15 and thank you for sharing. I myself was in a real shocker of a hole not very long ago and I didn't even have any reason to be I just had this cloud or fog that would not leave.

Anxiety can be a real bitch and an emotion that at times can be totally crippling. Resulting in you behaving like someone or something you are not. Which then leads you to overthinking, worrying and believing you are somewhat hopeless though you know deep down you are worth more.
Of course these feelings then repeat into anxiety. Its a vicious circle

This is going to sound completely voodoo but hear me out honestly. There was a big discovery I made in that I was extremely low in vitamin D levels. There were a number of symptoms backing this up too but importantly research shows that low vitamin d leads to low moods. In fact vitamin D activates serotonin synthesis. I also learnt that vitamin D is the most important vitamin as well as it actually is more a hormone than a vitamin.

So I started to supplement vitamin D taking in 7500iu's (3x small tablets) a day and within a few days I felt so much better. I have been continuously doing this for 6 weeks and genuinely I feel like a different person to date. I feel so chilled, happy and aware of life's beauty. I now recommend taking Vitamin D to everyone and I will never ever stop consuming it.

Please try it out for yourself I am certain you will feel huge improvements and when you do I would love to hear you post back in time on your results.
Blimey, I had forgotten about this post. Glad it’s helping folks out. Going to give the Vit D a go, got to be worth a crack!
 

MrHullMysterious

Well-Known Member

Bucko08

Well-Known Member
Im certainly gonna give vit D a go, seems daft not to. Im another anxiety sufferer, and also defo have bits of ocd... never thought about the link but makes sense.
 

Johnny Vodka

Well-Known Member
I thought I'd managed to lower my anxiety levels with a combination of vitamin D, Lion's Mane mushrooms and turmeric tea. :lol: (Yes, I know that sounds like what the Pirate might carry around in his car boot for a night out.) But sadly not quite... I think, at least for some of us anxiety sufferers, having to mix back into society post-covid (for work, etc) bears its challenges. Goes without saying that avoiding class As, Bs and Cs and heavy alcohol sessions is generally pretty wise if you're prone to anxiety.
 

Tourist

Active Member
I get through each day with about 3/4 glasses of wine a night. A coping mechanism when you just want to scream into the void. The result is I don't sleep too well after. Constantly knackered. I generally lay off the other stuff now unless there is a birthday special or something wild/remote. Increasingly rare though. Living with someone with increasing depression, possibly on the edge of a breakdown is really hard though. Knowing what to say/do is a real skill I'm not sure I have. It's pretty solitary too. You go out less and just binge crap in all senses. You certainly find out who the fairweather friends are... Added to all that is the distance created by homeworking & being main breadwinner which only recently has started to catch up with me. It didn't matter in E London when I was in a studio alone with no cares and when everything was a constant party and on your doorstep. It's all different in Spain. It's really exhausting - 3 different languages, different communities, different rules + all the visa red tape, politics, and now year after year of grim news stories which never end. All of which sounds a bit self-pitying, not the intention, just a fair reflection of where things are at and why I probably seem a bit heavier on the internet these days. Obv not unique though, loadsa folk have been through far worse shit. Something to always remember when there's long radio silence.
 
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Johnny Vodka

Well-Known Member
The last two nights are the first two nights I haven't touched alcohol in weeks. Not quite sure how I suddenly managed or wanted to abstain. Would be good to get back to those pre-lockdown days of no drinking during the week (and not having to drink Bud Light for harm reduction :lol:).

@Tourist - is your partner getting any professional help?
 
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