Wee Trip, June and Septmber 2019 - Updated


New Member
So, I had a little trip to London for work...tough week. I was staying in the Hard Rock hotel that had just opened and after having a few drinks down the Sportsmen casino had a little all nighter....couldnt sleep. We were off for most of the next week for Eid (although still had to go into work Monday). Spontaneously at 5am decided to book a flight to Ibiza. Next, I am on a flight back to Dubai - made the most of it if trougth be told. Got home and within 6 hours, i needed to be down in Abu Dhabi for my 2am flight to Barcelona. Of course i came home and crashed so it was a mental rush to bung stuff into a bag and jump in a car. In the end made it with plenty of time and had a few vinos in the lounge. Bizarre seat up on the plane where you are sitting in the opposite direction.. For the first time ever, I think, spept on the flight (which was clearly a good thing for what was to become). Get up 90 minutes to go and managed to neck 2 bloody mary's and 4 champers (I'd used my miles to upgrade to business class). So front at Bareclona at about 8am....changed some pounds that id won at the casion to Euros.. Oh shit, I havent booked anywhere to stay...a quick search and got a good deal here: https://www.oneibizasuites.com/en/ibiza-suites-figueretas. Had a few breakfast pints and then onto a Veuling to Ibiza. Thankfully i'd paid extrra for a front seat so that i could make sure that i would get my bag on.

Arrived in Ibiza at about 10am, nae bother getting out of airport to hotel. Turned up at the hotel and a guy came out and picked up my bags etc. Not surprisingly my room wasnt ready but they gave me a few free drinks up in their room terrace. 11am, sitting looking over the sea...perfect...although i was sorting out a few things at work.

Got into my room and crashed the mini bar and now i was in full flow.

Walked along the beach down to PDB and picked up some XYZ... not really sure what to do with my night. Bought tickets for Solomun at Pacha. Went for a wee sundown boogie and back to hotel. Decided to nip down to Glitterbox at Hi. Wasnt sure what to expect but i must say it was awesome. Yes hi is not Space and i think after a year or 2 i can finally accept this. Met lots of new people and a few girls from Manchester who i'd become quite good friends with over the next few days, I know its cheesy, but Melon Bomb in the bogs was brilliant. We had really strong drugs (maybe part of this is that given where i live i dont partake on a regular basis). Next thing i know its about 5 am and the thought of using my ticket for Pacha was long gone. Been before on a Sunday before and this was a new experience and actually the easy tunes were probably good for me what with being out of the clubbing scene for some time. Ofcourse, I lost my card for my room which also had my credit card but that was a minor blip. Ended up taking the girls back to my apartment and had a few pints. Couldnt sleep but ended up forcing myself at about 11am. Missed breakfast in the hotel.

Got up at about 4 and took a wee line for a pick me up. Not sure what happened next but my next recollection is me in Amnesia for Pyramid (I think I may have went to Bora Bora at this point - anyway I recall Bora Bora was actually really good, back to its best from years gone by). Had intended to go to DC10 before but i guess i must be getting old (the days of doing a Circoloco/Cocoon double header are clearly beyond me now). I turns out i took one of the girls from Manchester with me. Amnesia have really improved their outside/smoking area since i was last there. We had tickets for the balcony whcih were 20E higher but you got a free drink. Didnt really spend much time there but it was good for a breather. HAd about 10 minutes in the Club room - great space but the action really was on the terrance. Tini was brilliant and by the time Villalobos came on things were in full spring. The set-up was brillaint. Proably a bit more commercially tinged that i was expecting but great all the same. The mxing was top notch. The lighting and prodcution really was great - stobes in pyramid shapes etc. The girl said here heart was beating too much so I took her home at about 6. A few pints on the balcony and sorted a few work issues and off to bed at about 10. Missed breakfast in the hotel.

Got up at about 6 and realised it was now Tuesday. I had then realised that I hadnt had anyting to eat since my London flight on the Friday night. Oooops. Went out to one to th reastuarants nearby which i subsequently threw up on the walk home. Had a beer on my balcony and then off to bed at about 1am.

Given my early night, I felt fresh as a daisy and made it for breakfast. Lovely hotel for food i must say, buffet option and al a carte. I had eggs benedict and a couple of glasses of Cava. Set me right up for the day. Had a wee snooze and then walked into Ibiza Town. MY shoes had desintegrated and i looked like a tramp if througth be told (remember i just bunged a few things in my bag on the way). Bought a nice new pair of levis shoes and some socks (i had only brought one pair with me - as i say tramp). whcih i changed into in the square and dumped my Ferrari Pumas. Went along the harbour and had half a dozen pints in one the reastaurants and a sandwich (progress on the food front). Stopped off at Mar Y Sol for a few more drinks (when i was here in February - regretably a day trip where i disgraced myself down San An Yacht Club - another story - it was under refubishment and looks good). I like this bar, great for chilling/watching the world go by and affordable. I got the taxi boat back to my hotel (theres a little harbour next to it) and then ordered a massage... Went to Restuarante Principle for dinner which was good - 3 meals in one day was amazing. Things are still kicking off and the only thing on that night was Flower Power. Went with an open mind and really enjoyed myself in what was the Funky room - i can see the appeal but the main room is just not for me for this night Met lots of cool people up in the terrace. Danced my socks off and got home the back of 7. Had a few pints on the balcony and then off to airport for my 10am flight. Made it no bother - 3 hours in Barcelona airport (few glasses of wine) and then onto Emirates flight back to Dubai. CAnt remeber much but when later i went to the bar for a drink, the air stewrdess said that I had boarded and then passed out - she guessed id been to ibiza

It was home in the early hours of FRiday which was a good decision...Obviously took a few day to readjust but made work on the Sunday fine. Sweating a bit, but fine - certainly in better shape when i've turned up back from Ibiza in the past (i've learned to have a few days to crash when getting back)

So, all in all, a great short break. Fantastic time to go as not too busy and brilliant weather. No doubt i'll be back September/October.

Your recap reads like an Irvine Welsh short story!


Well-Known Member
So I decided this year for my holidays to go to Europe. It's ridiculous staying where I do (Dubai) and where I’m from (Scotland) that the only country in Europe (apart from Ibiza) I've been to is France (I went for a ski trip at school to Morzine about 25 years ago – I’m 41 now!). So therefore i go decided to have a wee tour.

I got the new 777 with Emirates to Vienna - I used miles to upgrade as I wanted to experience their new offering (their windows are TV screens from outside...pretty cool). Regrettably, I had quite a few pints at the airport so ended up being maracked before take-off and my experience was somewhat wasted.

The itinerary was: Dubai-Vienna-Bratislava-Budapset-Munich-Nice…..I am not sure why I was kidding myself…there is absolutely no way I’d try and go on holiday without nipping off to my second home, Ibiza! I got to Vienna, for some reason I went to the casino and was somewhat successful (all the slots in the smoking area were paying out to me – still got some cash). When I woke up, half pissed, went online and changed my flight from Nice to Ibiza (and get the connection home from Madrid)

I made it to Munich for a day or 2. Fooking hell, the beers are strong…I got very very merry. Had a 11am flight to Ibiza and so got an Uber to the airport (65 euro!). I was rather intoxicated but made the flight no bother.

Arrive at Ibiza airport. Fooking luggage fecked etc. so had a beer at the café. Normally sitting in an airport café would be my worst nightmare however, sitting there in Ibiza people watching was quite interesting.

I got my luggage and headed to my hotel. This time I stayed at Ocean Drive. It was very pleasant (you can get a boat into Ibiza Town from across the road). I like the fact they serve breakfast until 4pm. However, I generally don’t eat when in Ibiza so it was a waste for me adding this on. They have a superb roof terrace and sitting watching the sun go down is quite pleasurable.

Totally pissed (I had a few drinks on the flight from Munich), I decided to go out. I sourced x,y,z and immediately felt much better. On tonight was Cocoon at Underground. It was absolutely fantastic. More about the people than the music for me. I spent ages sitting in the garden talking absolute nonsense (if Debbs reads this, get in touch - as I said, “ill make sure you’re fine”). I had been up all night the previous day in Munich and even drugs couldn’t keep me going so I bailed at about 4am. I am sorry that I didn’t meet any other Spotlighters as it appears there were lots there.
Felt aright first thing Monday and went out for a wee wander. Got the ferry taxi over to Ibiza Town and had a nice meal at Café Forentera. Pretty expensive (80 Euro) but I did have a bottle of red wine and really usually I ate something. It was a lovely day and chilling was perfect. Then, the twat of me kicked in….

Went to Amnesia. Still, without doubt, the best club in the world globally id say. I had gone to Pyramid in June when I had my last visit and I was blown away (oh matron). This time was also really good. I filtered between the terrace and the main room. Later on, I thought the terrace with Villalobos was pretty boring (the crowd thinned out pretty quickly). In contrast, the club room was banging, Faranoe (I think that’s him?) was immense and I was completely absorbed in the music. I am not sure exactly what happened next, I was sitting in the hotel bar having a cana dealing with work emails! Managed to get to my room and just simply could not sleep….even my meditation app would not work. I went and bought beers to try and drink myself through it – nope! At a about 2pm I put Skynews on the TV and watched Brexit crap, still no sleep. I was absolutely buzzing (these stimulants are ridiculus!)

Going in and out of a coma, it was suddenly 11pm. I could hear thunderstorms….and then it started pissing down. Fook sake! I wanted to catch pan pot and despite the weather I fell into a cab and made it to Resistence. It was ok busy but not as much so if the weather had been better I would think. It is a great club but I think their sound system in the main room needs improved. I was still fooked from the previous night and apart from a wee line or two, I didn’t partake. I met this lovely couple who were English (not sure from where and I think I did my best to offend) and 3 girls. We all went back to my hotel and had a wee boogy in the bar with some Ibiza “classics”. One of the girls came up to my room for a line, but 100% nothing happened – we are just friends.

The weather had cleared up a bit on Wednesday so I had a few mid-afternoon pints. My flight was first thing Thursday so I decided I would have an early night. A few down the neck and went to Ushuaïa for Dance or Die. First time there and absolutely hated the venue and clientele. DJ Harvey was pretty good but the vibe of the place is so shit in my view.

I left at about 10pm and nipped over to Tantra where I met the legend that is Jonny Vodka. What a fantastic dude he is – a complete pleasure to meet. Now, he may say that I was a bit fecked at this stage but, I’d say I was “merry”. It started to pish with rain…literally rivers going down PDB!. I stopped off and got a carry out of beers and attempted to make it home. No taxis etc due to the weather but eventually (3 of my 6 pack down) I grabbed one back. Unfortunately I said to go to Ocean Beach and ended up in bloody San An. To make m.atters worse, it then went to the wrong Ocean Drive! My idea of not going out was f***ed at it was now 4.30am.

Had about an hour shut-eye and got up. Due to weather, the taxi to airport took 90 minutes versus the usual 15. I would have missed the flight but they were all delayed. I had Air Europa flight to Madrid. I thought a few drinks would take the edge off so had 2 cans. Arrive in Madrid and have left my wallet on the bloody flight. Thankfully I managed to get this back from customer services. Used my miles again to upgrade on Emirates and had one of these on-board showers (the good think about this is you can have a sneeky fag).

Well, that another year done (been 3 times this year to Ibiza). I said when I was about 30 this was my last but there is a draw that I can’t describe! See you 2020!


Well-Known Member
Absolutely amazing review like always ??
My BIG question :
How is it possible to remember all this with the amount of drugs and alcohol you are taking? ?

Johnny Vodka

Well-Known Member
You're the legend, mate. I am actually a little surprised you remember me! Though you're by no means the biggest caner I met over there. ? I was actually quite boring that night and didn't keep with you as long as I should have. Mix of apocalyptic weather and wanting to meet @Gingersolstice that night meant plans were all over the place.

Johnny Vodka

Well-Known Member
These are my holiday photos. I took 4 in total...?...1. self explanatory 2. Plane home watching the wizard of Oz tripping out my heid 3. Amnesia

I do have that funny pic of you and me on my phone. I can post it here... but only with your permission.