Which celebrity would you stalk and how would you do it?

N

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Saw on the news today that the guy who plays a popular judge character on telly had a stalker, she was convicted today.

This got me thinking.........

So...

I would stalk Bruce Forsyth.

I would do this by popping up in his life at many opportunities throughout the day, out from behind a hedgerow or from behind a display of Cornflakes in Sainsburys.

I would take every opportuity to dance around in front of him in an annoying manner while cracking cringeworthy "jokes". I would also make a few snide/crude/slightly uncomftorable comments about his wife, and of course EVERY time i would happily shout Nice to see you, to see you......

I would do this for One day for every year he has inflicted himself in this exact same manner on the great British public, so probably about 50 days or so.

I wonder how funny he'd find his infuriating catchphrase, school boy dancing, Christmas Cracker jokes and frankly quite sickenning pervy comments after 50 days of them directed at him for once.

HOW WOULD YOU LIKE THAT BRUCEY BOY YOU BLOODY ANNOYING CRINGEWORTHY OCTOGENARIAN COFFIN DODGING TWINKED TOED OLD GIT?!?

I would hope this would be enough to get him off our screens once and for all :)


Tell me your stalking fantasies :)
 
Become a piano tuner and stalk Myleene Klass


If unsuccessful I'd have to settle for lurking in the lingerie section of M&S.

50:1 ratio against wrinkly piss smelling beard growth hags though

Ah well...
 
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Without a doubt I would have to stalk Micahel Jackson!

I would love to be a fly on the wall in his life... just to find out what the **** actually goes on!

J
 
Saw on the news today that the guy who plays a popular judge character on telly had a stalker, she was convicted today.

This got me thinking.........

So...

I would stalk Bruce Forsyth.

I would do this by popping up in his life at many opportunities throughout the day, out from behind a hedgerow or from behind a display of Cornflakes in Sainsburys.

I would take every opportuity to dance around in front of him in an annoying manner while cracking cringeworthy "jokes". I would also make a few snide/crude/slightly uncomftorable comments about his wife, and of course EVERY time i would happily shout Nice to see you, to see you......

I would do this for One day for every year he has inflicted himself in this exact same manner on the great British public, so probably about 50 days or so.

I wonder how funny he'd find his infuriating catchphrase, school boy dancing, Christmas Cracker jokes and frankly quite sickenning pervy comments after 50 days of them directed at him for once.

HOW WOULD YOU LIKE THAT BRUCEY BOY YOU BLOODY ANNOYING CRINGEWORTHY OCTOGENARIAN COFFIN DODGING TWINKED TOED OLD GIT?!?

I would hope this would be enough to get him off our screens once and for all :)


Tell me your stalking fantasies :)

That would actually make good TV:D
 
Saw on the news today that the guy who plays a popular judge character on telly had a stalker, she was convicted today.

This got me thinking.........

So...

I would stalk Bruce Forsyth.

I would do this by popping up in his life at many opportunities throughout the day, out from behind a hedgerow or from behind a display of Cornflakes in Sainsburys.

I would take every opportuity to dance around in front of him in an annoying manner while cracking cringeworthy "jokes". I would also make a few snide/crude/slightly uncomftorable comments about his wife, and of course EVERY time i would happily shout Nice to see you, to see you......

I would do this for One day for every year he has inflicted himself in this exact same manner on the great British public, so probably about 50 days or so.

I wonder how funny he'd find his infuriating catchphrase, school boy dancing, Christmas Cracker jokes and frankly quite sickenning pervy comments after 50 days of them directed at him for once.

HOW WOULD YOU LIKE THAT BRUCEY BOY YOU BLOODY ANNOYING CRINGEWORTHY OCTOGENARIAN COFFIN DODGING TWINKED TOED OLD GIT?!?

I would hope this would be enough to get him off our screens once and for all :)


Tell me your stalking fantasies :)

Oi I love Brucie! Leave him alone! :eek:
 
god i love this movie...!! hahaha

i would stalk gordon ramsey. i would find some stupid man to take (&pay ;)) for me to eat @ whatever restuarant of his he is working at every night of the week until i slowly worked out a way of convincing him to come & check out my ****hole restuarant that he could do his kitchen nightmare show in! THEN.....i would dump the stupid man who thought all those ramsey dinners where going to lead into my panties & start stalking the real ramsey everyday in skimpy little outfits (for the tv show of course! ;))

*please note: my ****ty restaurant would (just happen to) have a cosy little abode upstairs where gordon would come up2 try some of my heavenly desserts..... !:p

talk about stalking fantasies!! hahahaha.....
 
i'd stalk tabloid jounalists.

in fact is there a market for a website, stalking journos & revealing them to be the adultering, coke fuelled, porn watchin hipocrites that they are?

maybe some celebs would fund in a revenge fix?!
 
you find out a lot about people's mindsets reading threads like this..

If I had to stalk someone, it would probably be a spy or someone out of a big court case who nobody ever knew if they were guilty or not
 
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I'd stalk Mischa Barton . I'd probably just hang around her back garden and sniff her underwear went out on the washing line.
 
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