Heartbroken

Paddy Eeziglow

Active Member
As part of my career (I'm a Learning Disabilities nurse), I look after people literally from when they hit puberty till they die. A man whom I've known for twelve years and for whom I've been his "named nurse" for the last seven is close to death. He will almost certainly die this weekend, and after all these years I'm (literally) the closest thing he has to family (he has no other family at all). My heart is broken and my soul feels as though it hs been ripped from my body. I look and feel like a zombie. I spent last night holding his hand and talking to him (although he is literally hours from death he is conscious and very lucid), which makes everything that much harder. It's worse than losing a member of the family because I know him better than (for instance) my own brother. I'm his best mate in the whole wide world and there's nothing I can do for him. Although I'm acting professionally on the outside I'm screaming on the inside. I'm f***ed.
 
That's so sad :cry: I have the upmost respect for people in your profession.

I'm sure you have made the poor man's life inifinitely better over the last few years and I hope in time you can remember all the good times you shared together but that won't ease the pain at the moment :cry:

Hope you're doing ok xx
 
Hey Paddy. That's really rough. :cry: Barbie is right though - you can take pride in having improved this man's quality of life. There is really no greater calling on this earth than spending your time helping others.

Keep busy, keep moving, pop on some tunes and think of the good times you had. You're a professional, so you'll get through it. Take care.
 
I'm really sorry Paddy that's awful news and it must be unimaginably difficult for you at the moment.

However, hopefully one day you will be able to reflect and realise truly what you brought to this persons life. I for one think that is something you can and should be very proud of.

All the best to you and take care

Pip
 
You are a wonderful person doing what you've done for so long. Try to take that with you, as you have done this person so much.

Hope your ok mate, take care
 
Thank you all. I was rather drunk and venting my frustration when I started this thread. Even the doctors are not sure what's keeping him alive at this point- he's ready to go, but his body just won't stop functioning. It's terrible.
 
Paddy you are an angel on Earth. It is people like you that restore my faith in humanity :) It is so good to know that he will be sent off knowing how much you care about him. -xo PG
 
PachaGirl79 said:
Paddy you are an angel on Earth. It is people like you that restore my faith in humanity :) It is so good to know that he will be sent off knowing how much you care about him. -xo PG
*speechless*

Thank you.
 
'Admiration' doesn't do justice to the what you and your ilk (not all generalisations are bad ;) ) inspire in the rest of us Sir. My thoughts are all yours.
 
Take comfort Paddy in the knowledge that you made a huge positive difference in someone's life.

Not many of us can honestly say that.
 
From my local paper last week....... when I read it I immediately thought of you Paddy;

Thought for the week;

A hundred years from now it will not matter what our bank account was; what sort of house we lived in; or the kind of car we drove...........but may the world be different because of the love and respect we showed to everyone we meet.

Most of us strive for status and material wealth but they can so easily be taken away from us. In the end our true and lasting value is in our relationships with each other.
 
Just an update: My friend passed away peacefully today at 1pm. As a colleague of mine put it- "He's gone to play with the angels in a place where he won't have need for his wheelchair- he'll be able to run, jump and dance with the best of them." God bless him. My bottle of single malt is going to take a battering tonight.
 
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