What have Heather Mills & Everton got in common?
Their second leg is just for show!
Everton have just announced 'Easy Jet' as the new club sponsor – They will get new shirts with ''in and out of Europe in a few hours'' printed on them.
Following Everton's poor run in the league and in europe, OXO have decided to make a stock cube in tribute to the toffees. they're going to call it the laughing stock.
An old lady falls over outside Goodison and Moyes goes over to help. He asks the lady can she manage and she says ''F*ck off I don't want the job!''
After Everton's cr@p start to the season I nailed my season ticket to the club gates in disgust. Next day I had a change of heart and went back for it - and some b*stard had nicked the nail.
Rumour has it that Everton have got a new sponsor: Tampax. The board thought it was an appropriate change as the club is going through a very bad period.
Have you heard the one about the Evertonian who bought a 'Golden Goal' ticket and found the word "October" written inside when he opened it!?
What's the difference between Nigel Martyn and a taxi driver?
A taxi driver only lets in four at a time
Why does David Moyes keep visiting Argos?
Because that is the only way he can pick up any Premier points
What’s the difference between Everton and a tea-bag?
A tea bag stays in the cup longer
David Moyes goes into a building society to deposit some money. Whilst there, a robbery takes place, and David is knocked unconscious during the struggle. In a few minutes he comes round, but is still very confused.
"What, er, how, er, where am I?" he mumbles.
"Relax. Your in the Nationwide" says a paramedic.
Moyes replies, "Bloody Hell! You mean I've been asleep all season?"
David Moyes went to the Everton Xmas party dressed as a pumpkin. Come midnight he still hadn't turned into a coach.
Their second leg is just for show!
Everton have just announced 'Easy Jet' as the new club sponsor – They will get new shirts with ''in and out of Europe in a few hours'' printed on them.
Following Everton's poor run in the league and in europe, OXO have decided to make a stock cube in tribute to the toffees. they're going to call it the laughing stock.
An old lady falls over outside Goodison and Moyes goes over to help. He asks the lady can she manage and she says ''F*ck off I don't want the job!''
After Everton's cr@p start to the season I nailed my season ticket to the club gates in disgust. Next day I had a change of heart and went back for it - and some b*stard had nicked the nail.
Rumour has it that Everton have got a new sponsor: Tampax. The board thought it was an appropriate change as the club is going through a very bad period.
Have you heard the one about the Evertonian who bought a 'Golden Goal' ticket and found the word "October" written inside when he opened it!?
What's the difference between Nigel Martyn and a taxi driver?
A taxi driver only lets in four at a time
Why does David Moyes keep visiting Argos?
Because that is the only way he can pick up any Premier points
What’s the difference between Everton and a tea-bag?
A tea bag stays in the cup longer
David Moyes goes into a building society to deposit some money. Whilst there, a robbery takes place, and David is knocked unconscious during the struggle. In a few minutes he comes round, but is still very confused.
"What, er, how, er, where am I?" he mumbles.
"Relax. Your in the Nationwide" says a paramedic.
Moyes replies, "Bloody Hell! You mean I've been asleep all season?"
David Moyes went to the Everton Xmas party dressed as a pumpkin. Come midnight he still hadn't turned into a coach.
