It's Friday so it must be time for a crap joke thread!

Jam Man

Active Member
Bob phones his buddy Sam the horse rancher, and says that he is sending a friend over to look at a horse. Sam asks" How will I recognize him?"

"That's easy" says Bob," he's a midget with a speech impediment".

So, the midget shows up, and Sam asks if he is looking for a male or female horse.

"A female horthe". Sam shows the little guy a prized filly.

"Nithe lookin horthe. Can I thee her eyethz"?

Sam picks the midget up and he gives the horses eyes the once over.

"Nithe eyethz. Can I thee her earthz"?

Sam picks the little fella up again and shows him the horses ears.

"Nithe earthz. Can I thee her mouf"?

Sam's gettin' pretty ticked-off by this point, but he picks the little man up again and shows him the horse mouth.

Nithe mouf. Can I thee her twat"?

Now Sam's pissed! He grabs the midget under his arms,and rams his head as far as he can up the horses twat, pulls him out and slams him to the ground!

"Perhapth I should refrathe that".

Could I thee her wun awound a widdow bit"?
 
A woman and a baby in the Doctors surgery,the Doc is concerned about the babys weight.

"Is he bottle fed or breast fed?" the Doc asks.The woman replies,
"Breast fed".

The Doc gets her to strip to the waist so he can examine her breasts,he pinches her nipples and sucks and rubs each breast in turn for a while,then he says,

"No wonder the baby's under weight,you have no milk woman!"



"I know" she says, "I'm his granny,but I'm glad I came!"
 
Sorry about this one. In my defence, my very well behaved & professional father whispered it in my ear at breakfast with the family - I nearly spat my beans over my mum...

Whats the difference between Gary Glitter & Colin McCrae?

Only two kids went down on Colin McCrae's chopper!

Sorry I only share that out of scientific interest.
 
Q: What has anal sex got in common with spinach?









































A: If you were forced to have it as a child, chances are you won't like it as an adult.

:oops::oops::oops::oops:
 
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