I GOT A JOB!
- Thread starter sexki11en
- Start date
PachaGirl79
New Member
U go girl! 
N
N8
Guest
Whoop whoop 
Can I share this topical ditty with you..... It's quite long, but funny tho...
Heaven or Hell
One day while walking down the street, a highly successful HR Manager was tragically hit by a bus & died.
Her soul arrived up in heaven where she was met at the pearly gates by St.Peter himself. " Welcome to heaven" said St Peter " before you get settled in though, seems we have a problem. You see, strangely enough, we've never had an HR manager make it this far, and we're not really sure what to do with you ".
" No problem" said the woman, "just let me in "
" Well I`d like to " said St Peter, "but I have higher orders. What we're going to do is let you spend a day in Hell & a day in Heaven and then you can choose whichever one you want to spend an eternity in"
"Actually I`ve made up my mind, I want to stay in Heaven " said the woman.
"Sorry.. we have rules" and with that St Peter put the executive in an elevator, and off it went down-down-down to hell.
The doors opened & she found herself stepping out onto a beautiful golf course. N the distance was a country club and standing in front of her were all her friends - fellow executives she had worked with and they were all beautifully dressed and cheering for her. They ran up - kissed her on the cheek & talked about old times. They played an excellent round of golf and at night went to the country club where she enjoyed a superb steak & lobster dinner. She met the Devil, who was really quite a nice guy (kind of cute) and she had a great time
dancing and telling jokes. Soon everyone was shaking her hands & she was back in the elevator.
The elevator went up-up-up and opened up at the Pearly Gates. St Peter was waiting for her & said " Now it1s time to spend a day in Heaven"
So she spent the next 24hrs lounging around on clouds, & playing the harp & singing. She had a great time, & before she knew it the 24 hrs were up & she was back with St Peter.
So you've had your days in heaven & Hell " said St Peter ,"now its time to decide where you want to spend eternity"
The woman paused for a moment then replied " I never thought I`d say this, I mean heaven has been great, but I think I had a better time in Hell"
So St Peter escorted her to the elevator, and again she found herself going down-down-down back to Hell.
When the doors opened she found herself standing in a desolate wasteland covered in filth & garbage. She saw her friends were dressed
in rags & picking up the garbage to put in sacks.
The Devil slunk up , grinned & put his arm around her.
"Idon`t understand" said the woman. "Yesterday I was here & there was a golf course & a country club. I ate steak & lobster & all my friends & I had a great time"
The Devil smiled and said " Yesterday we were recruiting you ......today you're an Employee!!"
Good Luck - even though I don't know you 
Heaven or Hell
One day while walking down the street, a highly successful HR Manager was tragically hit by a bus & died.
Her soul arrived up in heaven where she was met at the pearly gates by St.Peter himself. " Welcome to heaven" said St Peter " before you get settled in though, seems we have a problem. You see, strangely enough, we've never had an HR manager make it this far, and we're not really sure what to do with you ".
" No problem" said the woman, "just let me in "
" Well I`d like to " said St Peter, "but I have higher orders. What we're going to do is let you spend a day in Hell & a day in Heaven and then you can choose whichever one you want to spend an eternity in"
"Actually I`ve made up my mind, I want to stay in Heaven " said the woman.
"Sorry.. we have rules" and with that St Peter put the executive in an elevator, and off it went down-down-down to hell.
The doors opened & she found herself stepping out onto a beautiful golf course. N the distance was a country club and standing in front of her were all her friends - fellow executives she had worked with and they were all beautifully dressed and cheering for her. They ran up - kissed her on the cheek & talked about old times. They played an excellent round of golf and at night went to the country club where she enjoyed a superb steak & lobster dinner. She met the Devil, who was really quite a nice guy (kind of cute) and she had a great time
dancing and telling jokes. Soon everyone was shaking her hands & she was back in the elevator.
The elevator went up-up-up and opened up at the Pearly Gates. St Peter was waiting for her & said " Now it1s time to spend a day in Heaven"
So she spent the next 24hrs lounging around on clouds, & playing the harp & singing. She had a great time, & before she knew it the 24 hrs were up & she was back with St Peter.
So you've had your days in heaven & Hell " said St Peter ,"now its time to decide where you want to spend eternity"
The woman paused for a moment then replied " I never thought I`d say this, I mean heaven has been great, but I think I had a better time in Hell"
So St Peter escorted her to the elevator, and again she found herself going down-down-down back to Hell.
When the doors opened she found herself standing in a desolate wasteland covered in filth & garbage. She saw her friends were dressed
in rags & picking up the garbage to put in sacks.
The Devil slunk up , grinned & put his arm around her.
"Idon`t understand" said the woman. "Yesterday I was here & there was a golf course & a country club. I ate steak & lobster & all my friends & I had a great time"
The Devil smiled and said " Yesterday we were recruiting you ......today you're an Employee!!"
Good Luck - even though I don't know you mambobirdette
Active Member
Well done sweetie, now you can
Its all upwards again from here
Its all upwards again from here