Deepseadivers Double Header 2010


Well-Known Member
First Time Around

I decided to do things a little differently this year as my friend who I normally travel to Ibiza with had other plans. So, I decided to take my wife Cathy and two girls aged 11 and 8 years, together with a child sitter in the form of my mother in law Sylvia.
I had booked the flights well in advance and after all the reviews read on the net we decided on an AI option at Club Bahamas in PDB.

Tuesday 24/08/10

We arrived at Manchester Airport at 4.45am. There should only be one 4.45 in the day and after being unable to sleep the majority of the night we were all tired teddies at check in. We were booked onto the Jet2 express, after only a small 45 min delay due to a faulty seal on one of the doors (!) we were on our way. Nice short flight and no wait for taxis at Ibiza we were at the hotel by about 1pm local.
At reception we upgraded to AI. This had been our plan all along rather than book in advance. The hotel was busy but not rammed. Our rooms were large enough but the view was of the hotel to the side. We had asked for two rooms (didn't bother to complain as we knew that the hotel was full) next to each other but this was not so, Sylvia was a few doors down the corridor and had the pleasure of sleeping with our 8 year old. There was a fridge in the room which was not stocked with any AI drinks but nice touch. The rooms are designed for 2 people but comfortably fit in the put me up beds provided for the children. We unpacked and then went for a spot of lunch in the main restaurant. The drinks AI was San Miguel on draft and adequate bottles of Red, White and Rose wine with a good selection of drinks for the children. The spirits were local and adequate.
We got into our Speedos and made our way onto the beach. The hotel is situated almost directly onto the beach and as you make your way out onto the sand, Nassau is to the right and No Name to the left. There is a hotel beach bar but this is not included in the AI which means that when you want to top up ones alcohol levels you have to trek the 100 metres to the hotel pool bar. This might not seem much but it was really hot, apparently hotter than the normal weather. The sand was the same temperature as the surface of the sun and spilt more than I drank trying to return.
I was itching to get to Bora Bora and about 5pm we all wandered down to meet some friends who were staying at The Garbi. We were able to sit at a table in the restaurant half. Music was pumping'and the usual vibe lures me back year on year. Not sure what our late 40's friends thought of it but Pete mumble “What's he on?” pointing to an emaciated lad who was dancing on the table right in front of the speaker. In the absence of Spiderman, he appeared to be the latest addition to craziness. Eight stone wet through and wearing an array of Bora Bora memorabilia, he was performing some sort of out of time, ear splitting ritual whilst young scantily clad girls brushed up against him. Who was the fool? After 3 or 4 pints of San Miguel served by the scariest bar staff in the Europe and some intermittent dancing we made our way back to the hotel for dinner about 8.30pm. We were all very tired and after watching the hotel entertainment were in bed before midnight.

Wednesday 25/08

Good sleep had by all. We spent a day between the beach, pool and bar. Again, it was really hot and Sylvia spent most of the time resembling a beached whale underneath her recently acquired “Ibiza” umbrella whilst Cathy and I waited on her. Our youngest daughter was in and out of the sea and due to her being on the fair side; C was up and down rubbing in 3 gallons of Ambre Solaire all day. The eldest went to the Waterpark with our friends.
About 6pm Sylvia offered her services (easy now) so Cathy and I wandered down to Bora Bora where we went crazy on the “terrace” whilst downing a fair few of your Spanish pints. Spoke to Scarecrow behind the bar who said that people in August were crazy and that he preferred September. He tells me that every year? There was a slight difference to the September crowd but nothing as drastic as some make out. I did not recognise any of the DJs playing. We were back a bit late, just in time for dinner and after a mild scowl from Sylvia, we settled down for the hotel entertainment. Got to Bedfordshire about 1am, after quite a few Hierbas.

Thursday 26/08

Day spent on the beach and all had an earlyish dinner.
Tonight was Space and Sylvia was in charge of the girls who were staying over in her room. We had decided on Come Together due to the fact Monza were on the terrace from 7pm. I had got us on the GL and planned to arrive about 9pm when it would be rocking. On arrival at Space at 10pm there was no queue. The Monza promoter made some calls to see if we were on the GL (despite me having the email and photo ID) then let us in.
So, its August, we are in one of the best clubs in the world and the place is empty. Okay I am being a bit harsh, there were about 10-15 other bods in there. Real let down but I had a plan. We had a quick drink, ran out of the place, hurriedly walked past the Don Toni, onto the beach, turned right and into Ushuaia. It was now 10.30pm and one of my favourite DJs was on the CDJs. Should have just come here in the first place. Sasha played an epic set (including The XX) in an intimate venue. He has never failed to deliver since seeing him at the Hacienda in the early years. The moon was bright and we drank a nice Spanish red wine out of goldfish bowls whilst dancing in the sand. It was quite emotional and romantic really and it was one of the best nights I have had in Ibiza to date, simple but good. Sasha finished his set with Foals - Olympic Airways. I just had to congratulate him. He slipped behind the DJ booth near to the bar. Grabbing Cathy's hand, she reluctantly followed me as I pushed her towards Sasha and said to her “Ask him for his photograph with you?” It seemed a bit more appropriate, despite me being in touch with my feminine side. Cathy spoke with him as he put down his glass of branded fizzy pop. Sasha is truly shy but moved next to me whilst Cathy moved backward with the camera. She had asked him to have his photo taken with me and not her. What do you say to the big man? You certainly don't call him “Sash” which is what I did. I know he is not SASH!!!!!!! It just came out. My dog is called Sasha and I shorten it to Sash. I felt a right tit. Anyway, after saying thank you we left by the front entrance about midnight and one quarter and back to the hotel.

Friday 27/08

Mix of pool and beach day. Walked into the main part of PDB with my two daughters where they spent some money on tat. It was still very hot today. Had another walk later on to have a look a the Garbi and then on the way back called into Bora Bora for a couple of pints.
It was hotel entertainment tonight for the five of us with the girls finishing off with some dancing to Shakira's Africa and that Americano song L. Cathy, eldest daughter and I stayed up in the hotel bar having a few snifters and generally people watching. Bed about 1am.

Saturday 28/08

Lay in quite late and nearly missed breakfast. We stayed on the beach all day and had an early dinner.
Power naps are good after food and wine. Sylvia had the girls again and we joined them for an hour before jumping in a Taxi to Pacha for Defected. I have been to quite a few Defected parties and thought that this was the best bet for Cathy's musical taste, pretty much straight down the middle HOUSE.
We arrived at 12.15am and went to the restaurant where I had booked for 12.30am. We had to wait at the side entrance as we were too early. I asked it we could go to the bar but was greeted with a grumpy “Its full.” We were taken through after about ten minutes to our table. Well I use the verb Table very loosely. I had not noticed this before but they have a small number of seats around the Sushi makers quarters. They are the worst seats in the house and have obviously been put in there in a Ryanair style attempt to get more bums on seats. We were sat alongside each other and I had to keep turning to speak to Cath. Anyways, we both had a Sushi starter, Pacha burger mains washed down with beer and a bottle of vin rouge. We ordered a brace of Mojito to take into the club (its tradition), the total being about 125 euros.
Mojitos in hand we made via the Funky Room into the main room and chilled on the Balcony. Dennis FERRER was on and the place was comfortably busy. It was by now about 2.30am.
Now I know Grego did a review of this night but it did not pan out quite the same for me. Something was missing that night, I was not getting any urge to dance. This was my third visit to Defected having previously had good nights with ATFC in 2009 and Shapeshifters in 2008. I am a big fan of the Defected "sound" and decided on this for my Pacha 2010 experience. Cathy has not been to the island for a good few years due to me holidaying with a friend and having explored all the options, came to the conclusion that this would be a safe bet ( She has previously listened to Defected mixes and liked them)
We stood there for 10 minutes or so but still neither of us felt compelled to dance. He was playing an incessant thud which was not reminiscent of his recent hits/releases. This just went on and on for about half an hour before I suggested we left and explored the rest of the club. I was a little embarrassed as I had been going on for months about how good Pacha is.
I anticipated that the next DJ would start anytime after 4am and returned to the main room near to the steps nearest to the entrance. FERRER was still playing his thud. No emotion in the crowd, not much reaction and no hands in the air stuff, just thud. I noticed Shovell was lighting his josticks and Riva Starr milling around the booth waiting to go on. Ferrer plays "Hey Hey" for one of his last tracks before at last standing aside for Starr. After a promising Acapella of "My House" and a cracking 1st tune, guess what, it went back to thud. No hands in the air, no emotion, hardly any crowd reaction. We gave it a polite 45 minutes before leaving.

We were not the only people leaving, the steps where we were stood were empty when they are normally full and the taxi queue was long. It was only 5.15am!!! I wanted to stay till the end, when the lights cross at the back of the room, beg for one more tune. This was not the case, the only people left were the sheep like and the drunk or drugged.
Got to bed about 6am. Worst night in Ibiza to date.

Sunday 29/08

Up about 11am, to a handful of 5htp. Another day of AI food and drink.
We all got the bus into Ibiza Town early evening. Made the usual mistake of getting off at the bus and having to walk to the harbour. Had a really nice evening looking around Dalt Villa, shops , little nic-nac stalls, watching street entertainers etc. Had a few drinks at the first small bar on the left as you walk into Dalt Villa after going up the medieval ramp. Really nice night but had to get a Taxi back about 11.00pm before Sylvia turned into a pumpkin.
Cath, eldest daughter and I stayed up far too late in the bar after performing the old 1980's trick from the UK – Tripling up at last orders.

Monday 30/08

Ouch. First real hangover of the hols but nothing San Miguel couldn't solve.
Another really good chill day, pool, beach etc but it was a bit cloudier today and the weather was changing to that unpredictable September stuff.
Cath and I made it to Bora Bora for about 6pm for what was our best visit. The tunes were a lot more tribal to begin with. Teasing tech house and then borderline proggy (sounds like I know what I am on about), as the light starts to fade. Who was this DJ? I stepped inside and saw that it was Alex Miles. Alex is the best Bora Bora DJ at the moment in my opinion. He told me that he had been playing the daytime slot for the past week or so. Brilliant session; Lad dancing with girl he had just met and could see the boner through his shorts. Italian girls unofficial wet T-Shirt competition. Old people, young people, too much beer (I had to go on bottles).
We left gone 9pm and met Syl and the girls in the restaurant where we were scowled at. Managed to get the last bits of the buffet.

Tuesday 31/08

Early flight home left hotel at 9.30am. Don't wanna talk about it. Sad day is leaving day.


Club Bahamas – good 3 star family hotel. Overall food was of a good standard. I would recommend it but wont go into too much detail. You would be better off with Trip Advisor or JFGI.

FLIGHTS - £550 (5)
HOTEL - £1250 (5)
AI UPGRADE – £500 (5)
SPENDS – c.£600
FAGS SMOKED -160 (1)

Second Time Around

If someone would have told me back at the beginning of summer that I was going to Ibiza twice this year, then I would have laughed.

Wandering around PDB during our first trip I picked up a copy of the free “IBIZA” DJ MAG and read about a competition to win a three night break for two. When I arrived home I entered and whilst sending the answer to the breakfast TV style question Cath mumbled "You won't win that." I secretly knew that she was probably right.

On 10th September I was contacted by Monarch then a PR Company who told me that I had won. I raided the savings account and my large Bells Whiskey jar in the spare room (prize did not include spends alas) for our stay at Es Vive from Thurs 23rd to Sun 26th September.

Thursday 23rd September

As we had won the flights, we had no say in which one we were on and the 10pm Monarch flight was it. On arrival at the check in desk at Manchester, Cath and I overheard some lads on the phone saying that the flight was delayed until 2.30am. We thought they were just joking but it all soon became reality as we handed over the passports. The French strike had affected flights and the knock on affect had pushed everything back throughout the day.
We went through to departures and started on the red wine! I always have to drink at the airport; it's a tradition, but not as much as some were. As other flights left, the terminal was starting to resemble Chalmuns Cantina, with all types of freaks, drunks, drugged (?) becoming extremely lary. The Police were called on one occasion but it did not seem make much difference to one group of lads, let's hope we're not next to them on the plane. After another bottle of wine Cath fell asleep as I watched the early morning flights appear on the departure board. Then as if by magic about 1am they gave us a departure time of 2am. Yippee!!! Once on the plane, our fears became reality and we realised that we were next to the worst uncouth bunch of lads I have encountered in recent times. After the seatbelt sign went off, it was that bad, I had to ask the Cabin Crew not to serve them booze. They were not served any more booze. It was my worst flight ever.
After not getting any sleep, we arrived about 5am to a very quiet Ibiza airport and after dodging the fights in the Taxi queue (seriously). It had been raining and everywhere was very wet. We were in our room at Es Vive by 6.15am. We had been given a first floor room next to the stairwell above reception. It was a nice but small room decorated in a contemporary design.

Friday 24th September

I woke up at 10am with my usual Ibiza insomnia. I went down for breakfast on my own while Cath slept. It was a little cloudy and there were loads of available sunbeds around the pool. After a simple but satisfying feed I went back up to the room where Cath had reluctantly woken. We found a top notch position around the pool. Really nice sunbeds, soft white towels and from about 1pm, the best poolside house music played live from some decks outside. Not sure who the DJ was but she was good. The vibe around the pool was great, with waitress service and pricey food. We were on a little bit of a budget as we had not planned for the trip so as Cath was hungry we decided to eat over the road at Bar Llevant. This bar is overlooks the sea and is attached to the Appts Llevant. We had been here before when we stayed in 1998 (at the appts above the Tony Supermarket next to Es Vive). It is what I would call a traditional holiday bar serving food, like something from the 80's. I had a liquid lunch and Cath had an omelette and chips. We went back to the pool area and continued sunbathing to some cool vibes and at 5pm shared a nice bottle of Rose.
Sands bar at PDB (which is the same owners as Es Vive) was hosting a night with Deadmau5 that night. Our initial plan was to go to a sunset, maybe San Antonio, but we basically could not be arsed to go east. After chatting with some wannabe DJ's from the Home Counties, we got a shower, drank some Vodka Cranberry in the room and made our way on foot to Sands. It's not a long walk to PDB from that part of Figueretas and it gives you time to get your head together.
We stopped off for some well deserved Pizza at the take away (just past the Bora Bora road on the left) where I am a regular connoisseur of their finest cuts. It is the tastiest Pizza ever. We continued onto Sands via the Hotel Don Toni entrance. It was a good atmosphere and we ordered our free jug of Cava Sangria (won with competition) and sat on one of the large sunbeds on the beach. It was a clear night and the moon was glowing bright. The tunes were pumping out nicely and the chilled Sangria going down a treat. I think it was about 9pm by now and I am a bit hazy as to whether or not Deadmau5 had started his set but we moved up towards the DJ booth via the bar where we got a reasonably priced 5E bottle of Heineken each. Deadmau5 played well and was keeping the punters happy with his blend of chords, tame electro and proggy stuff. Not sure what hardware he had but he does not where headphones, at least I did not see any. I get the impression that he is on the edge though, constantly fidgeting and rubbing his head. It won't be long before another collapse me thinks. All was going well until the sound police spoke to him and he had to turn down the music to a considerably lower level. It just killed it so we left and walked across the cool sand to Ushuaia.
It was not too busy but enough. Not the same atmosphere as our visit in August but never the less we made our way through to the bar inside passing the DJ Booth on the right. I was hoping that Tania Vulcano would be on the CDJs but she wasn't and I have no idea who was. At the bar I asked for the wine list as we had previously done in August only to be told that they are only doing 1 type of red and it is 40E. I explained that I had bought one for 26E in August to which the girl replied “Not at this party.” How they can change the bar script for different nights I don't know? We annoyingly ordered 2 bottles of (over priced for a bar) San Miguel for 10E each. It's a beach bar FFS!! The music wasn't doing much for us and we were hungry so we stayed about ½ hour before walking up to Bora Bora.
Now, I normally prefer the earlier sessions at BB, when the sun is still in the sky. This quick visit proved to be a blinder. We ordered some basic food and water at the restaurant side which was cooked, eaten and payed for with about 20 minutes. There was a really good buzz on the outside. Spiderman had returned and was up to his usual tricks, Cath got chatted up by two separate lads whilst I was dancing on the tables! I love seeing her trying her best to bat them off politely!! We stayed about an hour but we were running on empty (imagine a cartoon character fuel gauge). After leaving behind some quality tribal house played through a cracking new sound system we walked back to the hotel.

Sat 25th September

Es Vive is noisy. Not in the afternoon, not in the evening, not in the night, but between about 6.30am and 8.30am in the morning. A lie in is near impossible when you have got Ali G on your floor asking his mate “Got any Puff?” “Are you awake?” on the phone repeatedly from about 7am for half an hour. Rather than risk a trip to Ibiza hospital I decided to leave him to it. My sensible side often helps me out in times like these but it was hard to show so much restraint. We nodded off again and woke up about 10am, down for breakfast and on the sunbeds by midday.
Another warm, sunny day around the pool. The DJ was a more eclectic/Balearic mix today, including Wham, PM Dawn, Depeche Mode and Happy Mondays amongst other stuff. The clientele at Es Vive was mixed from hen nights to quiet couples and loud mouthed caners to friends of the owners. No Northerners?
We had a late lunch at Bar Llevant over the road (19.50E for two) and then back over to the pool where we chilled into the late afternoon with a nice bottle of Rose (14E) before retiring to the room for a disco nap. Nap did not happen and we ended up watching Sky News and drinking a Vodka Cranberry. We left about 10pm and walked around the bay where we decided on a nice restaurant which I am unsure of the name of (to the right of Fusion). Cath had soup for starters and chicken and white wine main. I had king prawns in garlic for starters and a grilled mixed meat main washed down by a Rioja. We finished avec deux café noir. Total bill 60E.
We were the last ones to leave about 11.45pm and walked up the hill towards one of the main streets where we caught a taxi to the Pacha area. We had a beer and a smoke at an Ice Cream bar of all places, to the left of Pacha about 200m. We made our way to Pacha for Defected about 1.30am where we were met by the delightful Anna. We had managed to get on the guestlist (thanks Simon) and were looking forward to our gratis entry. Even better we were given wristbands giving us access to the DJ booth area. Miss Divine (also delightful) was on from 1.30 till about 2. She knows how to rock the place keeping the house music solid.
At 2am it was the turn of the cheese meister himself, Bob Sinclar. Now, don't think that this would have been my ideal choice. Being on a budget meant that waxing 100 notes on another club entry was not an option so we had an open mind. I can't even be arsed to review this part really but in summary about ¼ of the tunes were acceptable and he just whacks the cross fader over in an attempt to mix. The crowd seemed to like him. We popped in and out between the main room and the terrace before Simon Dunmore changed the tone and we were back on track with some quality Defected style main room 5am house. Stayed around the DJ booth for a while where we hit the middle floor to have our hearing damaged by the 500k or so megawatts of treble. We left about 6am and got a taxi easily outside. Back at the hotel, the Ali G impersonator was up to his old tricks and we got to sleep about 7.30am. Okay type of night really.

Sun 26th September

We had to check out by midday and the reception rang us about 11am just so we didn't forget! Like I needed reminding? Cases in a secure room and we were able to use the facilities all day. Same speck as the last two days, over in the corner near the pool bar at the front. The sun stays on this all day, perfect for sun worshippers. Having missed breakfast, we had some early lunch at Bar Llevant (I know…… Again!) as it was handy and cheap. Back to the hotel pool for the rest of the afternoon, where the DJ was playing a blend of funk and soul. Early bottle of Rose whilst the sun disappeared behind the Art Deco Miami style building.
We used the courtesy room to freshen up for one last party of the summer and then took the 15 minute walk to PDB. A quick pizza from the best pizza takeaway on the south side of Ibiza, burning my mouth in the process of eating it. We then joined the pre 6pm “Im a tight arse” queue for We Love at Space. In all honesty, there was no way that we were paying 50E as we had to leave before midnight to catch the flight home.
Jason Bye was on the sunset terrace and we waited a short while for premier etage to open just so we could chill a while in the sun. Also, Cath had not been to Space since the big expansions. We had a glass of the lowest quality red wine known to man when we heard the classics start to come from below. It was too much and we had to move to my fave spot on the terrace (steps to the right of the DJ booth). Bye knows exactly what classics to play without turning the place into an over sized Yates's wine lodge! Jaydee, Alcatraz, all good classics.
I think it was about 8pm when Alfredo came on and we stuck him out for about ½ hour. We went to El Salon for a drink, where it was a bit chilly getting back to the SST for about 9.30pm. At 10pm Funkagenda came on which is what I was looking forward to. With a quality “My House” intro the place went wild throughout his set. Edits, re-edits, samples and more accapellas. He played a mad mash up of Cirez D – On/Off.
Sadly we had to leave at 11.15pm and caught a taxi back to Figueretas. We went into Prince Tapas on the corner opposite the beach. I had a seafood pasta and Cath had a Lasagne washed down by a nice bottle of Vina Sol. We got our bags from ES Vive then it was off to the airport for the 2.40am Monarch to Mancunia. Booted some knob out of my seat on the plane and took advantage of the jammy extra leg room near the fire exit.
A good little break all in all.


Not noted that many this year but liked in addition to the few already mentioned
No worries –Butch
Rah Band - Clouds Across The Moon (Jay Lumen And Umek Hey Baby Remix)
Reboot – Caminando
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very nice breakfast reading 8) probably saw you at Defected, i was the 6'4" bald bloke dancing like a tw@ on the balcony next to the dj booth (the only space i could find ha ha)

Then i was at Space rocking to Jason Bye, one of the best dj's on the Island i think!

Congrats on winning the competiton!


No longer active
worst uncouth bunch of lads I have encountered in recent times. After the seatbelt sign went off, it was that bad, I had to ask the Cabin Crew not to serve them booze. They were not served any more booze. It was my worst flight ever.

nightmare - hopefully the spanish police kicked the crap out of them

No emotion in the crowd, not much reaction and no hands in the air stuff, just thud

surprised to read that. dennis ferrer is up there with the best on the planet for me - are you sure it wasn't just a crap system?

She had asked him to have his photo taken with me and not her. What do you say to the big man? You certainly don't call him “Sash” which is what I did.

I never bought into that sasha worship stuff. he is ultimately just a human being playing other peoples wavs off his laptop for loads of money. And he's never struck me as timid more aloof than anything - and above all probably just bored of doing the same thing over and over for the last 20 years.


Well-Known Member
nightmare - hopefully the spanish police kicked the crap out of them

surprised to read that. dennis ferrer is up there with the best on the planet for me - are you sure it wasn't just a crap system?

I never bought into that sasha worship stuff. he is ultimately just a human being playing other peoples wavs off his laptop for loads of money. And he's never struck me as timid more aloof than anything - and above all probably just bored of doing the same thing over and over for the last 20 years.

They were from Yorkshire by the sounds of the accents. I thought that they would have been more suited to Yorkshire Airlines

Really did a lot of research on which nights to go to due to the limited clubbing time available. Checked out Ferrer on youtube etc and thought that I would like it. Have really liked some of his releases, in fact "Hey Hey" still sends a shiver down my spine when I hear it.
I think that DJs are booked on the basis that they are associated with the label and the music that they produce. They have no direct say about the music that they play or the direction that they take as a dj. I just think he went off on one that night.

Pacha never been a real issue for me soundwise other than the earsplitting treble in the middle of the dancefloor.

I know what you mean in a sense. Its probably the fact that I have been listening to him for those 20 years and never met him. Nice enough guy but a bit of an enigma.
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Cheers. Couldnt believe it at the time.

Jason Bye IS the sunset terrace

nice to know people actually do win these competitions, sometimes i think they just make up the winners, or they're a member of staff at the magazine!


Well-Known Member
Sasha and some groupy



Sasha my dog


John McEnroe in Space queue




A PDB sunset
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