Massively detailed Ibiza Review 2012 :)

beans

Member
Ibiza was full of so many ups and downs it was so hard to explain if it was amazing or terrible. I suppose I had literally the worst days of my life and also the best days of my life and I have not exaggeration that at all. Some of the stuff that happened there was amazing and other stuff was disasters. So many dramatic moments and I will try and write them all down but I will probably forget bits because the whole holiday was packed with so many different things happening.

Anyway I know this is long so you probably won't read it, but anyway I will try and give a summary of what happened (even a summary is going to be loads of writing).

On last Saturday (4th August), we drove down to London Gatwick airport to get on our plane with Monarch to Ibiza. At the airport we were all really excited. I remember waiting in the waiting room just before our flight and we saw someone talking on the phone in Spanish. We instantly thought it was the footballer Juan Mata (if you don't know much about football, this guy is one of the best footballers in the world). We were so excited and desperate to ask him but he was calling someone on his blackberry so we didn't want to disturb him. Instead me and the two other guys I went with sat opposite him and literally just kept staring at him saying 'are you sure this is him?'. Every so often he would look back at me. I think I may have scared him as I was literally just staring right at him for ages. In fact, I am pretty sure that he must have been saying stuff about me to the guy he was on the phone to in Spanish (he was probably saying 'who is this weirdo looking at me' or something along those lines!). Anyway, eventually he came off the phone and I had a feeling he was 'fake calling' (pretending to talk to someone to avoid people going up to him). In the end my mate had the courage to go up to him and say 'are you juan mata' and he replied 'yes' in his spanish accent. We had a little chat with him asking why he was going to ibiza and he said 'he had a few days off training and this holiday was very last minute' and that was probably why he was flying with Monarch and not on a private jet. He spoke extremely quietly and I am not sure if he was doing this because he wanted to keep a low profile, or because Spain got knocked out of the Olympics or he may just have talked quietly. In fact, I didn't actually hear him talk - i just saw his mouth move (I only knew what he said because afterwards my mate was telling me everything he was saying). Then we asked for a photograph where 1 guy took the photo and then 2 of us had a photo with him, then that other guy had a photo by himself with Juan. However the camera didn't work so we had to say 'really sorry but the camera didnt work, could we have another one'. Then the camera didn't work again. Then again it didn't work. After about 5 attempts and saying 'we are super duper, incredibly massively sorry about this' it worked. But he was a really nice chap, quiet but friendly and seemed like a nice gentleman. He even offered me a handshake (I didn't even stick my hand out - he was the one who did it). On the plane there, we kept looking at the seats in front of us and just staring at him and talking about him. We were literally like 10 year old kids giggling loads.

Eventually, we got off the plane and I was so surprised how hot and humid it was. It was unbearable in fact and this was at about 1 O'Clock in the morning! I wasn't sure if I would be needing to put on a sweatshirt but I am so glad I didn't because it was that hot.

We then looked for Juan Mata as we got off the plane, seeing if we could see him one last time, however could not.

We then got on a coach which took us down to Ibiza Rocks hotel. On the bus were a group of Liverpool lads who had the most annoying accent ever. I had only heard the scouse accent on TV from interviews with football players but it was my first time actually hearing it in person and it was so annoying to listen to and put up with. And at one point the guy even said 'I don't think I have an accent!!!'. I live in the South of England in a little village near to places like Reading, Basingstoke and Guildford and about 50 minutes away from London. The coach ride was very slow. We had to wait 30 minutes before it even left and then the ride itself seemed to take forever. It was a Saturday night in Ibiza and I remember sitting by the bus window looking outside and being so surprised with the number of massively muscular guys I saw, all wearing tank top vests and looking like chavs. I was aware it would be a bit like this, but literally every guy I saw met that description with tattoos all over their body. The coach driver read out the names of the hotel at each stop, but since he spoke Spanish, it was hard to work out if it was our stop or not.

Eventually we got off the coach by the Ibiza Rocks hotel, but it took us a little while to actually find the main entrance to the hotel for the reception. We eventually found it after some help from a girl who was having a cigarette outside the hotel who said she worked there. We were about to go through the turnstiles but a girl in front of us had too much to drink and just collapsed to the ground. We then did get in at somewhere between 2 and 2.30. We tried to check in at reception, but the women said we had to check in at 8.30! So we then had to find a way of killing some time. There was this small room where we could put our bags but literally anyone could walk in there and steal our luggage so easily. However we took this risk even though it had all our money, passports etc in it. We wanted to use this night to learn about the area. We literally walked around not having a clue where we were going and where the clubs were. We actually ended up walking towards the west end. It seemed really dead at first but then we went down one or two streets and it was busy and there were guys and girls outside every club trying to have a chat with us and trying to get us to go in their clubs/bars. We were pretty naive and had massive chats with them all as we just thought they were trying to be friendly.

At about 3.45ish we decided to make our way back to the hotel as we were a little worried about our luggage. This was mainly because we were so surprised how chavvy the people were. We thought that Ibiza would be a lot classier than the other 'lads holiday' destinations. If the other places are more chavvy, they have to be an absolute dump!! I was incredibly surprised with the number of people wearing vests - i did read about that before but I didn't realise EVERYONE would be wearing them. To be honest though I come from a middle to upper class family so that could be why (although I've seen the bad parts of Reading etc). Our stuff was fine and had not been stolen. So we decided to get some sleep. Since we had no room as we could not check in, we slept by reception. I slept on this little couch, my mate sat on this thing which looked like a double bed (and actually looked quite comfy) and my other mate was on another couch. Somehow the other 2 slept really well but I just could not sleep because i was reluctant and worried that someone would mug us if we slept. Also loads of people kept walking past us and thought we all had passed out from drinking so much. Loads of slaggy girls who were very drunk would go up to my mate sleeping in the double bed and try and take his shoe off or put their boobs in his face, and one of them pinched his armpit hair really hard. I saw one guy go up to my mate and he went to look through his pockets. I had my eyes ever so slightly open (I was squinting). Luckily, a cleaner came over to clean the floor near him. This stopped the guy looking in my mates pockets. Then I just pretended I woke up. I knew what happened but I didn't want to say to that guy 'why are you looking in his pockets' because i didn't want to start a fight. So I just woke up my mate and asked him what the time was. Eventually that guy went away and I told him, check your pockets as he may have stolen something. Luckily he didn't and I think I was just in time and if I didn't do anything then he would have had everything in his pockets taken.

So after I got about 20 minutes sleep that night and the rest of the time just guarding my stuff and thinking how terrible the holiday was so far, it eventually turned to 8.30 so we could get our room. We went to check in and the worst possible news happened - they said the hotel room was not ready so we would have to come back at 2. I was so angry! I then needed to have a shower, clean my teeth, have a shave etc so I did it all in a public bathroom at the hotel. I dropped my toothbrush on the floor right by the toilet so that was another problem - i didnt want to brush my teeth for the rest of the 5 days there. I basically just lived off these mints I bought - not ideal but better than using a disgusting tooth brush. There was also another guy who had the same problem as us and I had a chat with him.

We couldn't bare the thought of staying in the hotel for longer. So we decided to go to the beach and had to leave our luggage in this little room again where anyone could get in. We asked at reception how to get to the beach and they said 'left then left again' We did this and we got to this place which was not a beach at all. It was basically a big cliff and there was the sea below us which looked really deep. We were expecting somewhere with white sand, lots of people etc.

For a while we thought that there were no beaches in Ibiza and this was it. So we sat on a bench just thinking how bad this holiday was so far. Lots of local people walked past walking their dogs, going for runs etc.

Anyway, eventually we decided to walk down following the coastline and we soon came to a busy beach (the one by Eden and Es Paradis).

On the way down, there were these African ladies who would try and ask you where you are from and then shake your hand. As they go to shake your hand, they will put a wristband round you then charge you for it. I was very dumb and she almost put it round my arm but I started getting aggressive and kind of yanked them away.

We then layed down on the beach and after 30 minutes, 2 of us went for a swim and the other person guarded the stuff. As we went into the water, we kept feeling weird stuff on the ground as we walked in. I have always been a bit paranoid what is on the ground in the water as I get scared I will stand on something like a crab. My mate went to pick some of the stuff up and he found beer bottles, people's socks, bra's and bikinis and basically stuff like that. We could have easily cut our foot on any of that stuff. The further out in the sea you go though the better it was.

The beach was ok but nothing amazing, however it seemed incredible because of what happened last night. Anything fairly average would seem amazing after the first night we had. Loads of people approached us on the beach and tried to be really friendly and promote their clubs. These 2 girls spoke to us first and they realised we only just got here as we were so pale. They were really sweet and friendly and in fact I fell for one of the girls. She was so nice to talk to, I was basically in love with her. They didn't just promote the clubs they work at but they just gave us loads of general help and the majority of the stuff they said was true. They seemed very genuine and the whole thing seemed legit. They their phone number to me and I kind of wasted a lot of money texting them because they were so friendly. This was probably why they were employed by the clubs though - because they are good at talking and selling things to people. We bought the tickets off them and had a brief chat. This was all we saw of them though and I wanted to meet up with them again for a drink because I was in love!

It was so hot and I wasn't used to the temperature so I wasted so much money on buying water there as well.

At about 3pm, we could go back to our hotel and get back into our room. They said our room was fine to use and gave us a little upgrade because of the disaster that happened last night. Even though we had an upgrade, the room was nothing special. All the upgrade was, was a slightly bigger balcony.

Getting into the room was the best feeling ever and I learned that having a room/house is something we take for granted and I felt so sorry for homeless people who always have to live like that.

I had a nice proper shower this time and it was nice and refreshing. Having a room felt great.

That night we went to Ibiza Rocks bar briefly but it was pretty boring. We had 1 drink there and got a picture taken by some camera man.

Then we went out to Eden after Ibiza Rocks bar. There was a DJ playing there but I can't remember his name. When we got in, it was pretty dead as there was barely anyone there. We were basically dancing almost by ourselves. Gradually more and more people came in. I got a dance or two with a girl. Where I was dancing was next to this ledge and later on that night a stripper/pole dancer women came out. I was dancing and had my hand up moving it about. Once or twice I accidentally touched her hand and accidentally hit her leg. I looked at her and kind of made a 'sorry face' and then she kind of smiled back and then moved closer to me and danced really close to me. Since I had never seen a stripped like this and been so close, it was really great and she was basically wanting my to hit her ass. I didn't want to get kicked out of the club but she basically moved right next to me and I did it without meaning too once or twice.

Later that night though, I started to get bored because it was just 1 DJ and he didn't sing or anything so just hearing this beat and some loud bass got boring after 2 hours or so. I then looked in my pockets and realised I had lost my phone. I was looking round on the floor for it and couldn't find it. It was a REALLY bad phone (costs about £5) but it had all my contacts on which I would not able to get back again. It also had a few numbers of people from Ibiza who were selling us stuff. So I really needed to get it back. After looking on the dancefloor for it with no success, I asked loads of bouncers and they didn't know. I then went in this room called the 'funky room' and literally lyed down on this big sofa and was really angry at everything.

We then left the club, went back to our hotel room and slept. Again, I barely slept because I could hear some chavs and slags shouting at each other and swearing and I think I heard a fight going off.

We woke up the next day and we just chilled and had a little chat and a laugh. Then I went to get this card I was using out of the safe. The card had 400 euros on, and I could withdraw money from an ATM whenever I needed to from it. I then put the ATM card down somewhere and totally forgot where I put it. We searched everywhere for it several times and couldnt find it. We were then just thinking 'oh not again, this holiday has gone from bad to worse'. It was weird because I never took it out of the room so it was not stolen. Everywhere we looked, we could not find it. Eventually we just gave up looking for it because we looked everywhere for hours for it. We then went back down to the beach.

Since the beach we went to was right next to Eden, I asked about my lost phone there again. The guy said the lost property section was not open but he said to come back down at 11.30 at night and look then. We spent another day at the beach and I got massive sun burn.

Then when night came, we went to Cafe Mambo for pre-drinks. We had a few shots of jaeger but not enough to get drunk or anything. On the table behind us was Greg James, Russell Kane and Amanda Holden! We spoke to the first 2 and got pictures with them. Greg James was really drunk and made a ridiculously funny face in the picture with me! Since Amanda Holden isn't a big name, we just ignored her though. We then saw loads of people suddenly get up from their chairs and sprint to this big screen. It was Usain Bolt who had just set a new world record in the 100metre sprint. I missed it! But I saw the replay.

Anyway, we then moved on in the same night to Ibiza Rocks bar to see this guy called DJ Postman. He was not well known at all but he was incredibly good! I got a few dances with some girls (around 7 dances throughout the night which was my record during the holiday - my mate only got about 2 or 3, and my other mate got none). One of the girls was really desperate or something because she literally just approached me (normally it is the guy who makes the move) and even moved my hand towards he privates. We then went up on the stage area and we were behind DJ Postman. It was so cool being behind him and seeing everything he does. Then at one point, he stops the music and points at my mate and says 'Have you farted?' and the whole crowd laughs at him! He said he hadn't farted but later that night he admitted he did fart! This DJ though was unbelieve and we didn't understand why he was not well known. Greg James played briefly at the Ibiza Rocks Bar but he was actually worse than DJ Postman. I even said to Dj Postman that he is better and he gave me a high five, and his girl was agreeing with me.

We then went to Eden and I got my phone back. I think that was all we did for that night but it is hard for me to remember it all.

Next day came and I got up at 10am (even though we only got back to the hotel at something like 5am). I left the hotel because I needed to find a Moneygram. This is basically a money transfer company like Western Union. It was because my parents cancelled the card I used with the 400 euros on in case someone stole it, and then just sent the money to me again using Moneygram. I was walking around dehydrated in the boiling heat searching for the shop but couldnt find it anywhere. Eventually I did find it though and it was closed so I was looking for another Moneygram. I found another one but it was also closed. I spent the whole day away from my mates and literally walked miles in the heat without a drink to find a Moneygram store that was open. After lots of help from the locals I found it!

We kept eating lunch as well at this place just round the corner from the Ibiza Rocks hotel. It is this restaurant with loads of football shirts hanging up and the guy in there is called Ricardo. He is a really nice guy and we became good friends with him, had some football chats with him. He helped me out to find a Moneygram store as well to get the money sent over.

Then that night we drank in the West End in this super cheap place. The guy basically wanted to get his bar busy so he said 'you can have one beer, one cocktail, one shot and one something else [which i can't remember what it was] for 10 euros', however he said the more people we could get to go to this bar, the more alcohol he would offer for 10 euros. So if we made a few friends and brought them over, it would be an extra drink added to the deal but still for 10 euros. Surprisingly though, even though the short glasses were triples, i didn't even feel slightly drunk.

We then caught the bus down to Space nightclub. Everything there was SOOO expensive but the club was amazing! It was huge! The best venue I have ever been in as it had so many people and was so big. We went into one room and we were dancing there. Some German girl approached my mate and he danced with her. The girl asked for a sip of his drink and he said 'yeah' (just because she was hot - she was blonde and was wearing a buttoned shirt but the first few buttons were down so you could see her breasts which were the roundest most amazing things ever!). 5 minutes or so later, they stopped dancing and he then said to me 'it's really funny, look how those 5 German girls or so would point at someone in the club and try and sell him drugs'. Then about an hour later, my mate realised HE HAD BEEN DRUGGED as well! When the girl took a sip of his drink, she must have spat some sort of drug into his drink. He went really light headed and he said his vision went bad, so he went to the toilet and I think he may have thrown up. We then took him upstairs, got him to sit down. And the drug really kicked in badly. His eyes kept closing, but then he opened them again (similar to when you get really tired and it is an effort to keep your eyes open). He said everything seemed like such an effort to do just simple tasks. He was sweating loads (you could see sweat dripping down from his eyes and you could see it dripping down from his shirt). He said he felt really hot, but then I touched him on his neck and on his forehead and he was REALLY cold! What I don't understand though, is this girl who drugged him was spotted by a bouncer and the bouncer took her out of the room but a few minutes later she just walked back in to the same spot as before! He said everything slowed down loads as well, but then he said once he woke up he felt fine again. But the thing is, he never even fell asleep in the first place! He also said he doesn't remember most of that night at all and he doesn't remember what that girl looked like! I actually wanted to beat up that girl. I would never really attack a girl but for doing something like that would probably just set me off!

Then Carl Cox came on in the same night out in Space. He was SOOO good! Everyone was buzzing. There were strobe lights, smoke, this cool spaceman/robot thing appeared which was cool. And to top it all off, I was right at the very front of the room in the dead centre just a metre or so from Carl Cox. Later on that night, I kind of drifted to the right a bit. There was this ledge and I was dancing with girl and throwing my hands on this ledge and stuff. Then not that long later, a stripper/dancer girl came out and stood at that ledge. She was practically revealing everything and I was so close to her again.

We left Space just before it closed to grab just a small amount of food (since everything was so expensive there). We saw a bus which went to San Antonio which we were about to get. I then realised I didn't have my wallet. So I panicked loads and sprinted over to where I just got my food as I thought I left it there. It wasnt there. I sprinted back and realised my mate had it. Panic over! It was all because I lost my phone (which I ended up finding when I went back to Eden) and losing the money card thing which was why I was panicking when there was actually no need!

Next day was the boat party. The pre-party was at Pukka Up which was dead. Everyone just wanted to get on the boat and no one was dancing or anything. The drinks were also pricey so no one bought much there. I made a massive mistake though in taking a big bag with swimming trunks, towels etc because I wasn't sure if we would be able to jump off the boat. I didn't have a clue what to expect so I brought that stuff just in case. We weren't allowed to jump off the boat so I had to be guarding that bag the whole time and it was hard to have fun. Having said that though, the boat party was great. I really didn't know what to expect and didn't realise just how difficult it would be to stand up and dance on a boat that is moving. People kept on falling into each other etc. But I got a few dances with some girls and it was great. As the boat was going back into the harbour, it was right next to another boat, and that other boat created a massive wave and almost knocked someone over the edge of the boat! I had to catch a girl because she basically went flying from one side to the other. Loads of people fell over, dropped/spilt their drinks etc!

That night we went to see Paulo Nutini at our hotel - Ibiza Rocks. He wasn't really my sort of music but I still thought he was good. His faster and more popular songs were great and people were going mental. But then he played some slower songs which were new and no one knew the words. Some girl kept trying to grind on me the whole night and I was like 'no, please just don't, what are you doing?'. I mean Paulo Nutini is not that sort of artist where you can just start grinding too - it's just not right!

We then went down to this really cheap shop which is located kind of between the Ibiza Rocks hotel and the West end that sells really cheap stuff. We bought these massive drinks which were equivalent of 3 pints and they were San Miguel. We got 3 of them so 9 pints. We drank them on the balcony and had a great time. My mate got drunk and started letting out loads of secrets. He was basically saying he is not gay but if there was a really hot guy, he would shag him! And letting out these secrets about this girl he is seeing at home. But then the night went from great to terrible. My mate started mentioning the money getting lost thing and one or two other things and it just pissed me off. He kept mentioning it and I was tipsy anyway so my emotions were running high. I basically just broke down in tears and I've never EVER done that before. It just went so bad. All 3 of us fell out. Then my mate went to the toilet and was in there for about an hour. We thought he may have been really upset or something and then we started going mad at him saying stuff like 'sort yourself out'. But then we realised he had actually been throwing up from the drug he had at Space the night beforehand. He said the drug kept making him feel on and off - one minute he felt really tired and everything was a lot of effort, and the next minute he was fine.

After that horrible emotional bit, we went over to Es Paradis because was could get in to it for free as long as we got there before 2. We got there a little after 2 but we thought they would probably be quite flexible and let us in anyway. They let us in but my mate was walking really far behind us. So me and my mate walked into the club, then I stopped and walk back the other way (towards the entrance) to find my other mate. He wasn't allowed into the club because it was past 2 O'Clock and then the bouncer said 'where did your other 2 mates go' and he said 'i don't know but they are somewhere inside' so the bouncer came over and asked us to get out. Then we just walked over to Eden as it was next to Es Paradis and was also meant to be free. As we got there, the bouncer said the same thing - 'you cant go in as it is past 2 O'clock'. So we all kind of sulked and sighed and turned around to start walking out. Then the bouncer grabbed my arm and said 'don't worry just go in'. So he let us in for free. Basically he was trying to charge us to go in but since we weren't going to go in if we had to pay, he let us in for free because he thought we may buy drinks. I think this was the night called 'Pornographic' at Eden. As it sounds, there were basically just guys in the clubs who filmed these naked strippers pouring champagne on each other and licking each others boobs on the stage. There were barely any girls in the club (other than the strippers) but I managed to have a dance with 1 which I thought was a good accomplishment considering 95% of the people there were guys.

Next day came and we kept going back to Ricardo's. By today or even the day before, we realised we were running short on cash and we were constantly looking for ways to save money. We were probably having 1 meal a day and sometimes not eating at all. And then we would just fill up the water bottles had previously bought from the tap in the hotel and take it out. The water from the tap in the hotel is edible/drinkable but tastes absolutely disgusting. But we had to put up with this and so we did. Last night came and it was Cream at Amnesia.

Example, DJ Wire, Laid Back Luke and this other guy was playing. When we got there it was the 'other guy' (I don't know his name). It was pretty boring when he was there. He was wearing a batman suit. I felt so tired from lack of sleep (we didn't have air conditioning in our room so we slept with the patio door open and every night you just hear people shouting and swearing which I could never sleep through (even though my friends could). And at one point in Amneisa I closed my eyes and I literally fell asleep standing up in a club. After the batman guy went though, out of know where Example jumped up on the stage and he was REALLY REALLY good. I wasn't really so much of a fan of all the music in Ibiza but Example was the best by far because it was more my sort of genre (i don't mind the dance/dj side of things but i don't really listen to it at home). I was singing all Example's songs and knew all the words. There was also someone who worked at Amensia who was throwing these freebies into the crowd. I managed to catch two of them. Inside was these batman goggles and a cape! I gave the second freebie away to someone next to me. Example was not on stage for very long though and only played a few songs and in between each song it was very obvious that he was tying to kill some time. After Example was Laid Back Luke who I found boring but that was probably because it is hard to sound good after Example has just played.

After every night out, on the walk back, we would go through the west end and get approached by loads of people selling drugs etc, see people chundering, see these two prostitutes shouting 'f*cky f*cky' etc.



I think that was the whole holiday. Lots of writing I know but I could have gone into so much more detail!

We went from the 4th (although landed on the 5th in the morning) and left Ibiza on the 10th midday. If you want to know anything else or ask me any questions, go ahead!
 

beans

Member
:lol::lol: best review ever.."Amanda Holden isn`t a big name so we just ignored her"..:lol:
Haha. I actually knew who she was and wasn't so sure who Greg James was but my mates were kind of the other way round - they knew Greg James but had only heard the name 'Amanda Holden' and didn't have a club what she looked like

:)

Wish I could have my first time all over again.

You do know you could have just bought another toothbrush? :confused: :)
It was definitely a unique experience and had the potential to be the worst time of our life!

It took us most of the holiday to actually find a proper supermarket place. The rest of the time we found these tiny little corner shops which didn't sell them. It wasn't a massive problem anyway really.


Brilliant review haha :lol:

Do you think you'll be heading back next year?
Thanks :) I am not sure about next year but we would have to do it again at some point. It was so expensive anyway and on top of that we had our money stolen which didn't help either. So I will have to work to get some of that money back, and then I am going on a gap year travelling so I will have to work for that, and then afterwards I am going to University. So money will be low and I'm not sure if I will be able to afford it!

Since we are only 18 and not massively muscular we didn't really settle in so much and it was obvious that we were very different from the stereotypical person in Ibiza (really muscular, from up north in england with a strong accent, aged about 24, swears non stop, chavy, tatoos everywhere, smokes non stop, loves a fight, offering drugs etc). So if we leaved it for a few years and then came back we would be the average age compared to everyone else.
 

beans

Member
Also one thing I learnt is that it can be so hard to understand some accents even when they are people from the same country you are from! This girl asked me a question and I had to say to her 'what did you say?' about 5 times before she just gave up asking me.


And for all the people that ended up reading that massive essay of a review, I salute you!
 

craig72

Well-Known Member
I never heard of Greg James or DJ postman.. Have to read it again later still pmsl at it..:)
 

OllieNotts

Well-Known Member
I am not sure if this is a wind up or not, especially after the "can I get sun burnt in Ibiza" thread but it was err funny to read :lol:
Can I ask is English your first language?
I think you could of done other things to have a better time, but in all honesty the first few times and probably many more are all a learning curve in Ibiza, you obviously realised the west end and it's usual clientèle are a bit less desirable then the rest of the towns people :twisted: That said I have seen much worse in other places like Portugal, Main land Spain and Magaluf :rolleyes:
 

OllieNotts

Well-Known Member
Oh, and I wish I saw Amanda Holden over there. I have had a crush on her for about 15 years I would of been desperate for a pic :lol::oops:
 
I

icebaer69

Guest
... He spoke extremely quietly and I am not sure if he was doing this
because he wanted to keep a low profile, or because Spain got knocked out of the Olympics
or he may just have talked quietly.

In fact, I didn't actually hear him talk - i just saw his mouth move
(I only knew what he said because afterwards my mate was telling me everything
he was saying) ...
:twisted:



... Then we asked for a photograph where 1 guy took the photo
and then 2 of us had a photo with him,
then that other guy had a photo by himself with Juan.
However the camera didn't work
so we had to say 'really sorry but the camera didnt work,
could we have another one'.
Then the camera didn't work again.
Then again it didn't work.
After about 5 attempts and saying 'we are super duper, incredibly massively sorry
about this' it worked ...
:lol:
 
I

icebaer69

Guest
... Since we had no room as we could not check in, we slept by reception ...
I just could not sleep because i was reluctant and worried
that someone would mug us if we slept.
Also loads of people kept walking past us and thought we all had passed out
from drinking so much
. ..
:twisted:







:eek: :eek: :eek:




















... .. Loads of slaggy girls ... would go up to my mate sleeping in the double bed
and try and take his shoe off
or put their boobs in his face ...
:rolleyes: :p :twisted:
 
I

icebaer69

Guest
... So we decided to go to the beach ...
We asked at reception how to get to the beach and they said 'left then left again'
We did this and we got to this place which was not a beach at all ...

For a while we thought that there were no beaches in Ibiza
and this was it.

So we sat on a bench just thinking how bad this holiday was so far
...
:lol: :lol:
 
I

icebaer69

Guest
:eek: crazy **** :eek:


... Space ... Some German girl approached my mate and he danced with her. The girl asked for a sip of his drink and he said 'yeah' (just because she was hot - she was blonde and was wearing a buttoned shirt but the first few buttons were down so you could see her breasts which were the roundest most amazing things ever!). 5 minutes or so later, they stopped dancing and he then said to me 'it's really funny, look how those 5 German girls or so would point at someone in the club and try and sell him drugs'. Then about an hour later, my mate realised HE HAD BEEN DRUGGED as well! When the girl took a sip of his drink, she must have spat some sort of drug into his drink. He went really light headed and he said his vision went bad, so he went to the toilet and I think he may have thrown up. We then took him upstairs, got him to sit down. And the drug really kicked in badly. His eyes kept closing, but then he opened them again (similar to when you get really tired and it is an effort to keep your eyes open). He said everything seemed like such an effort to do just simple tasks. He was sweating loads (you could see sweat dripping down from his eyes and you could see it dripping down from his shirt). He said he felt really hot, but then I touched him on his neck and on his forehead and he was REALLY cold! What I don't understand though, is this girl who drugged him was spotted by a bouncer and the bouncer took her out of the room but a few minutes later she just walked back in to the same spot as before! He said everything slowed down loads as well, but then he said once he woke up he felt fine again. But the thing is, he never even fell asleep in the first place! He also said he doesn't remember most of that night at all and he doesn't remember what that girl looked like! ...
 

Don Simon

Well-Known Member
Is this for real? beans,you seem very naive for an 18 year old with the internet on tap...
maybe an exercise in creative writing?
Whatever, an enjoyable read,so thanks.
 

kimajy

Well-Known Member
Assuming this is all "for real" ...

Enjoyed reading this .. start of your trip was definitely in at the deep end considering this :arrow: http://www.spotlight-forums.com/showpost.php?p=1433101&postcount=10 ..


think you did well to manage it out - all things considered - to be fair. The more tired you get and the more you indulge in booze and/or drugs, the more careful and focused you have to be with your stuff. It just takes lots of practice (and a fair few sacrificial possessions along the way) to get to the point when you're as in control of everything you lose during your trips as it's possible to be :!: :p


Must admit I'm a bit confused by the room thing. My guess is that you didn't pay for the room from the night before your arrival (i.e. stated your arrival date was the date you technically landed - which would give you a midday-2pm check-in that day virtually anywhere). Learning curve indeed ;) .. next time, if your flight lands in early morning / antisocial hours and you want in to the room on arrival, just book the night before you arrive and e-mail the hotel before you arrive telling them your arrival time. It usually avoids problems like you had.


Can't say you weren't warned about the vests ... with photos ;) :lol: .. seriously tho', don't judge everyone on their appearances or accents .. many apparently "chavvy" people are actually very nice... and there are plenty of well-turned out suave and sophisticated confidence tricksters about out there too :spank:. Are you glad you didn't take these now :arrow:


http://www.spotlight-forums.com/showpost.php?p=1433088&postcount=1



Presumably the card you lost was this one : http://www.spotlight-forums.com/showpost.php?p=1432918&postcount=1 .. if so, surely you can get the card re-issued to retrieve the money if it's been stopped ?



i did read about that before but I didn't realise EVERYONE would be wearing them. To be honest though I come from a middle to upper class family so that could be why (although I've seen the bad parts of Reading etc).



... or maybe it's partly because it's not usually in the mid-30s in the shade in the Shires ?


I then needed to have a shower, clean my teeth, have a shave etc so I did it all in a public bathroom at the hotel.



I wouldn't worry about it too much - lost count of the number of times I've ended up 'overstaying' in Ibiza and swinging by the airport after a stolen night in Space to shave and scrub my tongue to remove the thick nicotine-stained coating of a night of total over-indulgence :spank:

We then layed down on the beach and after 30 minutes, 2 of us went for a swim and the other person guarded the stuff.
..
The beach was ok but nothing amazing, however it seemed incredible because of what happened last night. Anything fairly average would seem amazing after the first night we had.



That's what I miss most if I go out to beaches in Ibiza alone... every single thing I take becomes something to have to look after. Over the years, have gradually whittled my needs down to the bare minimum which can come in the water with me in an aquapac. The rest is left behind :twisted:.

It was so hot and I wasn't used to the temperature so I wasted so much money on buying water there as well.!

You can survive on less water with some of this :arrow: http://www.dioralyte.co.uk/
.. forget the diarrhoea - loads of us use it before/after going into hot clubs and in the daytime too, to help deal with inevitable dehydration and reduce fatigue considerably... :twisted:

Getting into the room was the best feeling ever and I learned that having a room/house is something we take for granted and I felt so sorry for homeless people who always have to live like that.

8)
Again, I barely slept because I could hear some chavs and slags shouting at each other and swearing and I think I heard a fight going off.



You clearly hadn't drunk enough :spank: :lol:


We spent another day at the beach and I got massive sun burn.



:eek: ... didn't you read Knifey Spooney's thread on the matter before you left :arrow: http://www.spotlight-forums.com/showthread.php?t=76215 :confused:


I got a few dances with some girls (around 7 dances throughout the night which was my record during the holiday - my mate only got about 2 or 3, and my other mate got none). One of the girls was really desperate or something because she literally just approached me (normally it is the guy who makes the move) and even moved my hand towards her privates.




... please tell me you didn't pass up the chance of a quick shag on your maiden voyage to Ibiza :eek: :eek: :eek: :spank: :spank: :spank:


We then caught the bus down to Space nightclub. Everything there was SOOO expensive but the club was amazing! It was huge! The best venue I have ever been in as it had so many people and was so big.


Impressed you made it to a big club on your first trip. Shame about the drink thing - if it really was a drink-spiking incident (and not a delayed reaction to pre-drinking in San An which is not unheard of !) that sucks. Just have to be on your guard with drinks in clubs... and beware of German honey-traps with big boobies :lol:


We left Space just before it closed to grab just a small amount of food (since everything was so expensive there).



Actually, there's emergency food like sandwiches on sale behind the bar up the steps in the Sunset Terrace .. and it costs no more than a service station in the UK :eek: .. it's the drinks in there which are really pricey.


I then realised I didn't have my wallet. So I panicked loads and sprinted over to where I just got my food as I thought I left it there. It wasnt there. I sprinted back and realised my mate had it. Panic over! It was all because I lost my phone (which I ended up finding when I went back to Eden) and losing the money card thing which was why I was panicking when there was actually no need!



Sounds like healthy paranoia to me :p .. tho' a pair of Hywel's cargo shorts with secure pockets would probably have sorted most of your problems (that's why we wear them out and to clubs !)


We weren't allowed to jump off the boat so I had to be guarding that bag the whole time and it was hard to have fun.


:eek::eek::eek::eek::eek: - w t f :?: ... Now I know I would definitely not be bothering with a boat party in Ibiza these days. The only bit I really like is jumping off :spank: :spank: :spank:



Some girl kept trying to grind on me the whole night and I was like 'no, please just don't, what are you doing?'. I mean Paulo Nutini is not that sort of artist where you can just start grinding too - it's just not right!


Should have just taken her back to your room and had done with it :p


My mate got drunk and started letting out loads of secrets. He was basically saying he is not gay but if there was a really hot guy, he would shag him! And letting out these secrets about this girl he is seeing at home.



In vino veritas :?: :lol:. Booze, drugs, heat and lack of sleep = emotional rollercoaster :!:


I think this was the night called 'Pornographic' at Eden. As it sounds, there were basically just guys in the clubs who filmed these naked strippers pouring champagne on each other and licking each others boobs on the stage. There were barely any girls in the club (other than the strippers) but I managed to have a dance with 1 which I thought was a good accomplishment considering 95% of the people there were guys.



Pornographic is a notorious sausage-fest :). Too much dancing with the ladies, not enough s****ing - you're 18 in Ibiza :spank: :spank: :spank: :!::!::!::!:


After every night out, on the walk back, we would go through the west end and get approached by loads of people selling drugs etc, see people chundering, see these two prostitutes shouting 'f*cky f*cky' etc.



Oh the joys of the West End in the early hours :rolleyes: ... absolute carnage :lol: :lol: :lol:. If / when you go back next time, stay a bit further out of town towards Calo d'es Moro or at the Hostal Tarba near the bus station. Promise you'll find the experience far more pleasant and in all likelihood no more expensive ;)
 
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