I'm BACK....

x-amount

No longer active
a.k.a., My review of the opening weekend

guys, guys guys guys guys (et girlies)

Firstly...

WOW, what a weekend (s)!

In brief, thanks to all of you who were with me in what I always, with somewhat annual regularity, announce as my greatest ever!

I'll try not to outdo MarkSuns review for unnecessarily long and winding words, although I hope this reads just well!

Apologies for the a) public, b) rather late (for reasons which I assume you'll understand, but will explain later in any case!), and c) self-indulgent, post here. I was going to send you all a pm, but I thought you could do with the noteriety this gratuitous (for which I make no excuses) and cheesy backslap should bring!

I make similar apologies for the rest of the board who will no doubt look blankly at the private in-jokes (Taxi Mike? who the fu...))

I also feel I owe you all a bit of an emotional "no no no, I'm not just saying this. I really fcuking love you guys!..." speech because I didn't get round to saying it whilst we were away. Let's just say, I hope you'll excuse my performance that final Tuesday, my body-popping chameleon antics from the night before sapped all my energy! Having thought I (if I do say so myself) conquered things out there last year, this visit was a refreshingly more sedate journey (well, in compared to my younger do-everything-now-cant-miss-this-party-or-my-world-may-as-well-finish-right-now previous go's). And it was much better for it. Despite thinking I could pretty much pin-point my exact requirement fot each of the 69 hours or so on the island before I got there, I was once again reminded that, over there, all good plans and all that...

I now look back (it seems so long ago now though! and finally having 5 minutes to recollect the goings on), with a satisfying contention that I achieved all I/we set out to do.

Firstly, the main event of the Holiday. The primary reason 7 of us decided to go on that plane that fateful day....

Two words. Su Doku.

Let's just say it was called a "race", but in name only. Congrats to Damien and Mr Scoobie for the Silver and Bronze medals, in a tussle which had literally everyone on the plane strapped into their seats.

This added to the fact that the "engineer" who came to fix Steven's chair looked like he was, and in all fairness did, seemingly follow us raving all weekend. I suppose you had to be there to understand. Only in Ibiza (well, airplanes).

As every minute seemed like an hour as we frantically tried to turnaround and get to Buckleys party as quick as possible. the taxi to find the place was less than simple. A classic example of the traditional cabs-not-got-a-scooby-cant-speak-a-word-of-english banter....

Me: "Yes mate, we're looking for a fire hydrant sign"

Damian: "Dan, Oi'm naat sure he understands English dat well, so he doesn't" (paraphrasing somewhat!)

*hmm ok, I'll try spanish...*

"FIRE HYDRANT... "FI...YA... HY... DRANT..."

Still, we got there in the end, largely due to the cabbie phoning his mates to show us the way.

The sight of Buckley's trademark fin was a little more welcome than usual at this point, although the poor guy did seem to be having quite a bit of running around, with his similarly trademark nobility and unselfishness in making sure people were getting home.

The walk to the villa would have turned into a childlike srpint if it wasn't for the fact I couldn't see a thing other than the 3 feet that the light of my phone would allow. In true m25 rave era style, we were lead by the music, and as the faint hum of Nirvana got louder and louder, I finally had my "right, NOW I've arrived" moment, just in time for the first "duuuuuunnnnnnnngggggggg" piano(?) chord of Born Slippy.

After a brief tour, I'll only sum it up with wow after wow after wow. I simply don't hate the people on here who didn't go enough to go into further detail on how you guys missed out. I'll cushion any blow by saying the toilet facitlities were suitably bizzarre.

Cracking set by Mark Sun. Back to 2003 classics, with a few older bit's thrown in!

After fighting through the somewhat frustrating "hello mate, yeah nice to meet you. You've just arrived? Shit, you should have seen it earlier..." people, the party had "filtered" out the lightwiights (!), and it was lovely to be surrounded with familiar faces, great tunes, and, in true house party fashion, untouched warm San Miguels (eventually)!

Likewise Ben (as in cracking music, not unwelcome!, well other than the X-Press 2 tra...), Especially loving Backfired. Don't know who the clown was who came on after, but he certainly managed to clear the place! (only joking!) was all I could do to stop necking a couple and getting properly stuck in, (especially as the music was pretty much perfect for the party), but I wanted to be good and ready for the "little afterparty in Playa D'En Bossa tomorrow daytime...".

And let's face it, if it were any other day of the year, Buckley would have come to blows to drag me away from the place to stop me from seeing it in all it's daylight glory.

As I earlier professed, this was, in effect my Christmas eve. 1997 or so.

So with a lovely touch, my journey to bed was surprisingly and triumphantly seamless. Although the battle with the 5 foot sausage (calm down stuie!) I was given as a "pillow",and my anticipation of tomorrow meant my efforts to be asleep (in time for Santa!), was a little problematic, but like a Manager with 4 world class forwards to choose from, a "nice" problem.

And so I woke nicely refreshed, and looked over to my watch to see I had a nice bit of sleep, and, oh, Hello, how did I sleep walk into the sauna? My room was a touch on the warm side, and trousers were swapped for shorts as we set on our way.

Picked up tickets outside, and, despite still having the "yeah yeah yeah, been here before..." I still was hopping (literally) with anticipation as we got in.

And just in case there was any concerns about the Space speaker system, then I suggest that they employ the poeple in the queue that announced with a thunderous volume that would put funktion one to shame that "YES, DAN, YOU HAVE A BOGEY STICKING OUT YOUR NOSE...". Nice one guys. I think I got it.

The car park arena, which despite not being new to me, still got me going, and was rocking by mid afternoon. From a distance, all I could see were the lovely sight of semi-naked beautiful people, yet without the perma-tans which would made my casper like white-ness stand out more than the beaming Sun above us.

As you all can probably appreciate, once we familiarised ourselves to our surroundings, our first conversation went something like...

"Right, we need to find so... shit look there's Antonio", and as if he had a radar, our favourite Hairdresser/ Vet (Vet? With no K? Wha???)/Carpet and Rug merchant showed his sunglassed face.

That sorted, we milled around for a few hours, taking it all in, met James (thoroughly decent chap btw, almost feel guilty for some of my risque post on here, sorry, mate! Perhaps that was why I introduced myself as just "Dan"!)

Later on we popped out to check on Bora Bora and grab some food (cracking mixed grill by the way, and like anywhere that isn't Space, astonishingly cheap drinks prices(well, less than a fiver for a beer!!!)). For all those looking for an update on the place, in brief, the it's still the same, although I'd be lying if I said the roof didn't take something away. It wasn't that busy, but then there was only one place anyone in Playa D'en Bossa was going to be that afternoon. And so we departed back to Space, dreading the q, but it was only twenty minutes, and with dj in a hum vee playing outside to the crowd (or had it gone by then?), it wasn't as bad as I had feared.

Rest of the evening was spent dancing/wandering/dancing/repeat to fade... bumped into a few familiar faces (nods to Copperband), danced a bit more, made really geeky jokes about the insomniac cure that is John Digweed fnar fnar fnar, did an appauling attempt at my much hyped moonwalk (sorry!).

Had an impromptu glitter fight, giving Mr scoob's a preedy make-over, yet seemingly coming off just as worse as I swept the sweat from my brow. (Shit!)

Sets of mention were Carl Cox's housey few hours, although the next guy could have sent me through the roof and can only say how average it was after then.

Met Dr Mick, recognised him from somewhwere, but couldn't think where. I seem to remember him getting justifyingly coated by Mr Scoobie for not knowing how to use his own camera!, and after about 5 "no, one more, I'll get it right this time, cheese..." poses atempt, I think we just settled for the (deliberately,of course) blurry "action"! shots The new temporary terrace was ok, but without the surrounding 'hills' of the classic layout, I thought it lacked atmosphere. And whoever was playing last there, was just rolling out the anthems, with no sense of set (prog next to funky etc) But the big fat techno don kept me going nicely.

Left around 2-3ish, after the car park terrace had closed, and proceeded to Es Vive for usual drinks and shenanigans til dawn. At kicking out time there, went for a few beers with my usual 10am sidekick, although this time with the lovely Anna, who I'd like to say, came on leaps and bounds in that session. Obi Wan had taught her well indeed! If this was an end of season football wards ceremony, then she would have smashed the "Most Improved Player" award, and got to keep the trophy.

Popped back to the hotel for a bit of a wrestle with my giant sausage, only to be woken firstly by the maid (I'd like to re-iterate my point, that, you can be dead to the world, when you think that not even a brass band could wake you up, yet the sound of key in door knob seems to have the unique ability to wake me from even the deepest of coma's), and then Ben, to tell me they were off to dc10, or dee-see-deece, as the locals (and now a fluent spaniard like myself, No Volem Autopista, and all that) call it. Jumped in the shower, jumped in a cab, got to dc10, fell out the cab, stood up, did some stretches, had a touch and saw the others near the front of a largish queue ( although notthing compared to what it reached later on in the day, by all accounts). The funny sight was the weary clubbers just coming out in droves, and chilling int he car park, just to find a place to get away from the madness and find their minds.

I know I'm not telling anyone who's been there nothing you don't allready know, but there is just NO escape in there. No let up NOTHING. Full on getting-stuck-in-or-die-by-the-wayside. I still hadn't woke up (or slept, in all fairness) properly, and struggled to chill out for a few hours before I got right back on it.

And so I did.

With a hat.

A cowboy hat. And what are hats's for people........ WINNERS. Hat's are for winners. End of.

After the epiphany that was this miracle new Hat discovery, (btw, just in case anyone's trying to picture it, or if anyone hears any different from anyone, let me tell you, that hat made me look tough and masculine. Not camp. At all. Ok?)

was in time for a bunch of new faces to meet. Nods to Robbie G and his missus Shirley from Erin. Or was it Erin from Shirley?! Wheeeeey Croydon gag.) Mark Sun, again, and I think I saw Stu Hurst, who I'm still yet to meet properly, I think?

Oh, and took about 5 years off my eyesight with the constant "go inside, can;t see shit...go outside... cant see shit... go inside..." you get the picture (although I didn't)

After a couple of people decided to have a punch up when I went to the toilet (as in, I didn't see it, not that they were fightitng because I went to the toilet), and the general hustle and bustle got a bit too much and we decided to leave 15 minutes from closing, just so we could get a cab easily.

Now, I've never ever remembered trying to get a cab from dc10, as I've always been a bit too, y'know, but let me tell you, leaving 10 minutes form the end is no use whatsoever. After practically walking most of the distance to Bora Bora, we finally jumped in a cab for the rest of the journey, even forcing Robbie to leave his "Oh, she'll be alright..." missus behind!

Danced a bit at Bora Bora, waiting for the word on what to do. In this space of time, I heard one of my ultimate Bora Bora anthems, (Groove Armada vs DJ Sneak - I See You Hiding From Your Bud bootleg), and in a wierdly short space of time, my top techno tune, "Tomaz vs Filterheadz - Sunshine" (which, in all fairness, showed the bora bora soundsystem for the piece of shit (well, compared to inside Space and DC10 terrace!) that it was). It had to be said, it wasn't really floating our boat in general, and the trip to the NastyDirtySexMusic couldn't come quick enough.

The Blue Marlin was a cracking venue, not really my kind of music, and, after having my official position on NDSM being that I don't like it, I didn't really get involved on the main event in the sauna inside, yet had a great evening outside. Again, amazing venue, it only felt natural in my then state, to breakdance my way to the bar, and to climb one of the trees and get all comfy.

Left there a few hours from dawn, and ended up at our usual retreat of Es Vive, which was where I finally buckled, bit the bullet and went home.

Again, woke up by the piercing of the key in my lock "Hola Senor, out now please..." rolled over "Shit, it's 12 allready?!", got ready and packed in about 20 minutes, and then proceded to see if the others had woken up yet. To my admiration they were still up from last night, and I prompted to meet them, sitting with everyone's new bestest friend, superstar DJ Tim Sheridan. Much jokeness all afternoon, random stories about some geezer Taxi Mike (No, really...), who acted like a paedophile, yet looked like Danny Tenaglia's sound an (again, had to be there...). If only thay had of told me about the avialability of late check-in (fcukers!).

Oh, and if anyone's going there in, say, proabably about late August, could they please pick up My Strawberry sundae, and Bens Banana Daquari. They should be ready by then.

The journey home was full of fun and joy and happiness for all. Especially Karen. Oh, how I love flights home after a good caning session in Ibiza. Let's say no more on that one!

All in all quite a brilliant weekend. My hands are hurting now, and I'm bored of writing so I'll stop shortly. Many thanks to those who came with me, and those I met, in making this one as special as all the others. At risk of sounding too serious, thanks for making me feel welcome and everything, considering I came largely on my own. I also think I've got quite a few o's on my head, tho needless to say we'll sort that out next time we meet...

Anyway, hope you've enjoyed the review. I'm sure I've missed loads out.

I appreciate it's not the most lucid of journal entries, although it' s actually been a rather nice excercise as it's brought up all the memories of a trip that seems sooo long ago.

Sorry it'as taken so long, been busy in L'nia (cracking, spent less the whole weekend than I did in Space. Point of note was sitting in the pub Saturday afternoon and STILL found a piece of glitter on my ankle!!!), and had an exam and stuff.

Special props to Buckley for being a more than ample wingman, and in true spirit of the awards cermony, get's Players Player by a country mile. I salute you. We aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaalll salute you, sir.

So... then, 24th Sep to 4th Oct. Both Space closings and DC10. EasyJet £125 flights, accommo tba. Who's in?....
 
Dan - quality!

What a weekend, I will never forget you falling out of the cab at DC10, jumping the queue and then performing a warm-up worthy of a premiership footballer in front of everyone.

HATS-ARE-FOR-WINNERS :lol:
 
Good Review Dan! It was a pleasure meeting your good self!

Im well up for the 24th sept! Dont think Shirley (Erin) can make it tho
 
x-amount said:
.

Left around 2-3ish, after the car park terrace had closed, and proceeded to Es Vive for usual drinks and shenanigans til dawn. At kicking out time there, went for a few beers with my usual 10am sidekick, although this time with the lovely Anna, who I'd like to say, came on leaps and bounds in that session. Obi Wan had taught her well indeed! If this was an end of season football wards ceremony, then she would have smashed the "Most Improved Player" award, and got to keep the trophy.

Dan mate, I salute you, I love you like a brother, the weekend wouldn't have been the same without you (in a good way).

But.... you can't get away with this bit without including that part of the reason the current shone on Monday morning, was the comparison to your goodself (perhaps Russ can help me out with the relevant Shakespeare quote, something about gold in the dirt?). You were finished with a capital 'G' for 'GAME OVER'. :lol:

I will never, ever forget your efforts to keep us amused at the NDSM party where chameleon Dan was born. Also, hearing a squeaked 'MONKEY' and turning round to find you hanging from a tree in a simian fashion. You were a bit behind us and I'm not even sure you knew we were watching, meaning that you simply amusing yourself! :lol:

So... you coming out this weekend or what?

ps My review will posted early next week when I've got a bit more time.
 
I just had a flashback to you and Stephen trying to go to the bar in Blue Marlin and failing miserably due to your inability to stand up or remember an order of '2 vodka limon and a beer' :lol: :lol: :lol:
 
x-amount said:
I'll try not to outdo MarkSuns review for unnecessarily long and winding words..

:oops:

Excellent review mate!! Had me chuckling and gurgling into my pret sandwiches. What a weekend aye?!!!

Booked to go back 23-28 Sept, so see you there :D
 
Reading that just made me go all goosebumpy

Cheers dan, great review, sounds like you had an amazing time
 
x-amount said:
Oh, and if anyone's going there in, say, proabably about late August, could they please pick up My Strawberry sundae, and Bens Banana Daquari. They should be ready by then.

The best bit of this incident was that after forgetting Ben's drink for aaaaages, then refusing him a banana daquiri because 'we're all out of bananas', they then proceeded to include bananas in every concoction served after that! :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
 
notworthy.gif


Excellent! I must meet this one they call x-amount.

I know I'm not telling anyone who's been there nothing you don't allready know, but there is just NO escape in there. No let up NOTHING. Full on getting-stuck-in-or-die-by-the-wayside.

I have a feeling this quote is going to be ringing in my head upon my 1st DC10 visit. :twisted:
 
Buckley said:
x-amount said:
Oh, and if anyone's going there in, say, proabably about late August, could they please pick up My Strawberry sundae, and Bens Banana Daquari. They should be ready by then.

The best bit of this incident was that after forgetting Ben's drink for aaaaages, then refusing him a banana daquiri because 'we're all out of bananas', they then proceeded to include bananas in every concoction served after that! :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

I just didn't have the energy to put up a fight about it :x

Check out "Taxi Mike" doing his thing at DC10 -

f48b8e84-908c-4a91-9ab3-04f6ec866b00.jpg
 
j_love01 said:
notworthy.gif


Excellent! I must meet this one they call x-amount.

I know I'm not telling anyone who's been there nothing you don't allready know, but there is just NO escape in there. No let up NOTHING. Full on getting-stuck-in-or-die-by-the-wayside.

I have a feeling this quote is going to be ringing in my head upon my 1st DC10 visit. :twisted:

c7ae0149-ad2d-4c27-a4b3-8a2dc91b04da.jpg
 
Mark Sun said:
j_love01 said:
notworthy.gif


Excellent! I must meet this one they call x-amount.

I know I'm not telling anyone who's been there nothing you don't allready know, but there is just NO escape in there. No let up NOTHING. Full on getting-stuck-in-or-die-by-the-wayside.

I have a feeling this quote is going to be ringing in my head upon my 1st DC10 visit. :twisted:

c7ae0149-ad2d-4c27-a4b3-8a2dc91b04da.jpg

Buckley:

"Wake you fool! They're bottles not books!"
 
dan the man.

8)

btw, buckers, was this you at DC10?

"a purse of gold
most resolutely snatched on Monday night and most
dissolutely spent on Tuesday morning;"

or, re the lovely Anna
Beauty provoketh thieves sooner than gold.

or, bizzarely,
I'll hide my silver beard in a gold beaver (Coriolanus)
 
Buckley said:
Mark Sun said:
j_love01 said:
notworthy.gif


Excellent! I must meet this one they call x-amount.

I know I'm not telling anyone who's been there nothing you don't allready know, but there is just NO escape in there. No let up NOTHING. Full on getting-stuck-in-or-die-by-the-wayside.

I have a feeling this quote is going to be ringing in my head upon my 1st DC10 visit. :twisted:

c7ae0149-ad2d-4c27-a4b3-8a2dc91b04da.jpg

Buckley:

"Wake you fool! They're bottles not books!"

His head is resting on a copy of the latest Harry Potter book
 
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