10 great things about xmas
- Thread starter jjinit
- Start date
mambobirdette
Active Member
Giving presents and seeing the people re-actions
Dodgy cheesy stuff on TV, including the xmas movies
Stuffing your face
Seeing the family and friends
The excuse to get pissed every night
The German Market in Birmingham that sells mulled wine and has live bands playing xmas carols
The pretty festive decorations
No work
Possibility of snow
Huge quality street tins that you always get off a gran
Dodgy cheesy stuff on TV, including the xmas movies
Stuffing your face
Seeing the family and friends
The excuse to get pissed every night
The German Market in Birmingham that sells mulled wine and has live bands playing xmas carols
The pretty festive decorations
No work
Possibility of snow
Huge quality street tins that you always get off a gran
mambobirdette
Active Member
jjinit said:
Posh git
Buckley
Well-Known Member
mambobirdette said:Huge quality street tins that you always get off a gran
Is not normally your own gran particularly Mambs? If it just any old lady I wanna know where mine are....
Fast forward to Buckers resisting arrest after drunkenly harassing old ladies on Christmas Eve "Where's my f-ing chocolates you stingy old mare!"
Buckley
Well-Known Member
Hey Santa claus you c***!
Where's me f***ing bike?
I've unwrapped all this other junk and there's nothing that I like.
I wrote you a f***ing letter and I come to see you twice
Ya worn out geriatric fart, you forgot me f***ing bike.
If I wanted a pair of bloody thongs, I'd have bloody asked.
And this cowboy suit and ping pong set you can shove right up your arse!
You've stuffed me bloody order up
It's enough to make you spew
And I'm not the only one who's snakey
Me sisters dirty too!
(female voice)
Hey santa clause you c***!
Where's me f***ing pram?
You promised me you'd bring me one, you remember who I am.
'Cause I'm the little girl who you made sit right on your hand
I'll give you f***ing ho ho ho
You forgot me f***ing pram
(male voice)
Next time I come to see ya, I'm gonna punch you in the guts
And I'll let your f***ing reihndeer go and kick Rudolf in the nuts!
You just wait 'till next year, when you go to that store
And me and me little sister, come stomping through the door
And we'll say, yeah you wait for it
Hey mums and dads you smell his breath and check his bloodshot eyes
And don't listen to him boys and girls 'cause he tells f***ing lies
He's just a piss tank and a pervert, and he's not even very bright
'Cause the old f***ing wanker Forgot me f***ing bike.
You wait you old c***, I'm gonna dob you in
Tell me old man on you, he's gonna punch your f***ing lights out
"I saw mummy sucking santa clause"
Where's me f***ing bike?
I've unwrapped all this other junk and there's nothing that I like.
I wrote you a f***ing letter and I come to see you twice
Ya worn out geriatric fart, you forgot me f***ing bike.
If I wanted a pair of bloody thongs, I'd have bloody asked.
And this cowboy suit and ping pong set you can shove right up your arse!
You've stuffed me bloody order up
It's enough to make you spew
And I'm not the only one who's snakey
Me sisters dirty too!
(female voice)
Hey santa clause you c***!
Where's me f***ing pram?
You promised me you'd bring me one, you remember who I am.
'Cause I'm the little girl who you made sit right on your hand
I'll give you f***ing ho ho ho
You forgot me f***ing pram
(male voice)
Next time I come to see ya, I'm gonna punch you in the guts
And I'll let your f***ing reihndeer go and kick Rudolf in the nuts!
You just wait 'till next year, when you go to that store
And me and me little sister, come stomping through the door
And we'll say, yeah you wait for it
Hey mums and dads you smell his breath and check his bloodshot eyes
And don't listen to him boys and girls 'cause he tells f***ing lies
He's just a piss tank and a pervert, and he's not even very bright
'Cause the old f***ing wanker Forgot me f***ing bike.
You wait you old c***, I'm gonna dob you in
Tell me old man on you, he's gonna punch your f***ing lights out
"I saw mummy sucking santa clause"
DJ Soulman
Active Member
Buckley said:
Kevin Wilson - Hey Santa Claus You c***
Got it on mp3, wanna copy?
matt collins
Active Member
No thanks but it bought back memories.
puppylover
Active Member
time off work
time with Mr PL
lie ins
christmas morning is the best time of the holidays... making dinner, christmas music, going to the beach with the dog
Lunch - eating until you are so fat you think you are going to die, then finding space for a third helping of pudding
Christmas DVDs (tv is always crap!)
giving and receiving of gifts
smokes
champagne
long hot baths with gorgeous smelling gifts.....
... oooh suddenly got excited for christmas now...
time with Mr PL
lie ins
christmas morning is the best time of the holidays... making dinner, christmas music, going to the beach with the dog
Lunch - eating until you are so fat you think you are going to die, then finding space for a third helping of pudding
Christmas DVDs (tv is always crap!)
giving and receiving of gifts
smokes
champagne
long hot baths with gorgeous smelling gifts.....
... oooh suddenly got excited for christmas now...
Buckley
Well-Known Member
office party!
this will be my first ever real life office xmas. can't wait
FF *shakes head*
Kevin 'Bloody' Wilson - Legend.
(Not his greatest work, I'm much more of a "Living Next Door to Alan" or Mick the Masterfarter fan. I have (literally) several albums, and 3 or 4 live performances)